Aihuxi.110 net.jokes utcsrgv!utzoo!decvax!duke!harpo!cbosg!ihnss!ihuxi!anon Wed Mar 24 10:45:54 1982 wisdom FAMOUS ( OR INFAMOUS ) SAYINGS These following sayings were passed around our department on little slips of paper. Although not a complete list of them they represent great wisdom and as such I thought I would share them with everyone Paul's Law: You can't fall off the floor! Shirley's Law: Most people deserve each other. Pardo's First Postulate: Anything good in life is either illegal, immoral or fattening. Pardo's Second Postulate: The three faithful things in life are money, a dog, and an old woman. Glib's First Law of Unreliability: Computers are unreliable, but humans are even more unreliable. Glib's Second Law of Unreliability: Any system that depends on human reliability is unreliable. Glib's Third Law of Unreliability: Undetectable errors are infinite in variety, in contrast to detectable errors, which by definition are limited. Glib's Fourth Law of Unreliability: Investment in reliability will increase until it exceeds the probable cost of errors, or until someone insists on getting some useful work done. Golub's First Law of Computerdom: A carelessly planned project takes three times longer to complete than expected; a carefully planned project takes only twice as long. Golub's Second Law of Computerdom: Project teams detest weekly progress reporting because it so vividly manifests their lack of progress. Young's Law: All great discoveries are made by mistake. Troutman's first Programming Postulate: Not until a program has been in production for at least six months will the most harmful error be discovered. Troutman's Second Programming Postulate: Profanity is the one language all programmers know best. IBM Pollyanna Principle: Machines should work; people should think. Brook's Law: Adding manpower to a late software project makes it later. The Harvard Law: Under the most rigorously controlled conditions of pressure, temperature, volume, humidity, and other variables, the organism will do as it damn well pleases. Steele's Philosophy: Everybody should believe in something - I believe I'll have another drink. Lieberman's Law: Everybody lies; but it doesn't matter, since nobody listens. Beckhap's Law: Beauty times brains equals a constant. ----------------------------------------------------------------- gopher://quux.org/ conversion by John Goerzen of http://communication.ucsd.edu/A-News/ This Usenet Oldnews Archive article may be copied and distributed freely, provided: 1. There is no money collected for the text(s) of the articles. 2. The following notice remains appended to each copy: The Usenet Oldnews Archive: Compilation Copyright (C) 1981, 1996 Bruce Jones, Henry Spencer, David Wiseman.