annna-message-common - annna - Annna the nice friendly bot.
HTML git clone git://bitreich.org/annna/ git://enlrupgkhuxnvlhsf6lc3fziv5h2hhfrinws65d7roiv6bfj7d652fid.onion/annna/
DIR Log
DIR Files
DIR Refs
DIR Tags
DIR README
---
annna-message-common (54865B)
---
1 #!/bin/bash
2
3 [ "${IRC_CMD_USER}" = "${IRC_USER}" ] && exit 0
4 [ -z "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" ] && exit 0
5 [ ! "$IRC_CMD" = "PRIVMSG" ] && exit 1
6
7 export PATH="$PATH:/br/bin"
8
9 annnasumerian="𒈹"
10 annnabirthday="1989-05-18"
11 hashtagfile="${ANNNA_MODBASE}/hashtags/hashtags.txt"
12 idontcaredb="${ANNNA_MODBASE}/i-dont-care/i-dont-care.txt"
13 printnhashtags=2
14 brmembers="__20h__ Evil_Bob chripo posativ quinq stateless solene josuah parazyd bin KatolaZ adc Athas ROYGBYTE"
15 referees="__20h__"
16 ignorednicks="eidolon"
17 linkbrotherchannels="#bitreich-meme"
18 # Flag, if some expansion of some URI happened.
19 uriexpansion=0
20 # Do not spoil at all.
21 nospoil=0
22 # Enforce spoiling in case of hard nospoil filter.
23 dospoil=0
24 # Expand meme hashtag and show recommendations.
25 doexpand=0
26
27 # Personalities.
28 declare -A personalities
29 add_personality() {
30 for personality in "$@";
31 do
32 personalities+=(["${personality}"]="$1")
33 done
34 }
35 for person in preacher uplift trump mao teleromeo modem orphet luther sadh_guru;
36 do
37 add_personality "${person}"
38 done
39 add_personality grumpy-fart grumpy
40 add_personality santa sannnta
41 add_personality satan satannn
42 add_personality sigmund-freud freud sigmund
43
44 regeximatch() {
45 printf '%s' "$1" | grep -i -E -q "$2"
46 }
47 hashtags() {
48 cat ${hashtagfile} 2>/dev/null
49 }
50 hashtagcount() {
51 int2bit "$(curl -s gophers://bitreich.org/1/meme/count \
52 | grep total \
53 | head -n 1 \
54 | sed 's,.*total on .*: \([0-9]*\)),\1,')"
55 }
56
57 isignored=0
58 for ignorednick in $ignorednicks;
59 do
60 [ "$user" = "$ignorednick" ] && isignored=1
61 done
62 [ $isignored -eq 1 ] && exit
63
64 case "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" in
65 *\#nospoil*) nospoil=1;;
66 *\#expand*) doexpand=1;;
67 *::*::*)
68 if [ $(pgrep -f stable-diffusion-emoji 2>/dev/null | wc -l) -gt 3 ];
69 then
70 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, sorry, gophers://bitreich.org/I/memecache/bitreich-burning.png"
71 else
72 {
73 query=${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT#**::} query=${query%%::*}
74 emojiuri="$(stable-diffusion-emoji "${query}")"
75 if [ -n "${emojiuri}" ];
76 then
77 if [ -n "${IRC_CMD_USER}" ] && [ "${IRC_CMD_USER}" != "annna-cmd" ];
78 then
79 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ${emojiuri}"
80 else
81 annna-say "${emojiuri}"
82 fi
83 fi
84 } &
85 fi;;
86 *http*://*|*ytdl://*)
87 case "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" in
88 *"#spoil"*) dospoil=1;;
89 esac
90
91 case "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" in
92 *http*://*)
93 uri="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" \
94 | sed -n '/.*\(https\{0,1\}:\/\/[^ ]\{1,\}\).*/s//\1/p')"
95 ;;
96 *ytdl://*)
97 ytid="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" \
98 | sed -n '/.*ytdl:\/\/\([^ ]\{1,\}\).*/s//\1/p')"
99 uri="$(printf "https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=%s" "${ytid}")"
100 ;;
101 esac
102
103 # Set below and annna will concatenate at the end.
104 # HTML title.
105 urititle=""
106 # Subtitle URI.
107 sturi=""
108 # Replacement URI.
109 nuri=""
110 # Replacement URI display string.
111 nuris=""
112 # html2text content.
113 curi=""
114 # Set to 0, if some URI content should be shown.
115 nocuri=1
116 # Screenshot.
117 suri=""
118
119 # titleend=1 will not output any further.
120 titleend=0
121 outputstr=""
122
123 if is-invidious-instance "${uri}";
124 then
125 host="$(printf "%s\n" "${uri}" \
126 | sed 's,.*://\([^/]*\).*,\1,')"
127 if [ -n "${host}" ];
128 then
129 uri="$(printf "%s\n" "${uri}" \
130 | sed "s,${host},youtube.com,")"
131 fi
132 fi
133
134 tmpf=$(mktemp)
135 fetch-uri "${uri}" > "${tmpf}"
136 if [ ! -s "${tmpf}" ];
137 then
138 archiveorguri="$(archiveorg-uri "${uri}")"
139 if [ -n "${archiveorguri}" ];
140 then
141 sarchiveorguri="$(bitreich-uri-shortener "${archiveorguri}")"
142 nuris="archive: ${sarchiveorguri}"
143 fetch-uri "${archiveorguri}" > "${tmpf}"
144 fi
145 fi
146 [ -s "${tmpf}" ] && urititle="$(grabtitle < "${tmpf}")"
147
148 case "${urititle}" in
149 "");;
150 *Gunther*|*GUNTHER*|*Günther*|*GÜNTHER*)
151 annna-say "Oh Günther! ❤ ❤ ❤ ${urititle}"
152 uriexpansion=1;;
153 *\|\ Cloudflare*|"Just a moment...")
154 annna-say "Mind your own business! We got clownflared: gophers://bitreich.org/0/ascii/clownflare.vt"
155 titleend=1
156 uriexpansion=1;;
157 esac
158
159 case "${uri}" in
160 "");;
161 *github.com/*/blob/*)
162 urltitle=""
163 nuris="$(printf '%s' "${uri}" | sed 's/blob/raw/')"
164 nocuri=0;;
165 *imgur.com/*) nuris="$(youtube-dl -g "${uri}")" || nuris="";;
166 *xkcd.com/*) nuris="$(xkcd-uri "${uri}")";;
167 *imdb.com/title/*)
168 imdbstr="$(imdb2gopherbay "${uri}")"
169 if [ -n "${imdbstr}" ];
170 then
171 nuris="${imdbstr}"
172 urititle=""
173 fi;;
174 # bay.parazy.de is unmaintained
175 #*themoviedb.org/movie/*)
176 # movietitle="$(themoviedb2gopherbay "${uri}" | sed 's, ,+,g')"
177 # if [ -n "${movietitle}" ];
178 # then
179 # nuris="gophers://bay.parazy.de:666/1/q.dcgi?${movietitle}"
180 # fi
181 # ;;
182 *lichess.org/????????|*lichess.org/????????/|*lichess.org/????????/black|*lichess.org/????????/white)
183 nuris="$(printf "%s\n" "${uri}" \
184 | sed 's,https://lichess.org\(/[^ ]*\)$,\1,; s,^/\([^/]*\)/black$,/black/\1,; s,/white,,; s,\(.*\),https://lichess1.org/game/export/gif\1.gif,;')"
185 ;;
186 *npr.org/*)
187 post="$(printf '%s\n' "${uri}" | sed -n 's@.*/\([0-9]\{10\}\)/.*$@\1@p')"
188 if [ -n "${post}" ];
189 then
190 nuri="https://text.npr.org/${post}"
191 nuris="text only: ${nuri}"
192 fi;;
193 *csdb.dk/release/*)
194 sid=$(awk '/<a href="download\.php.*\.sid/ { match($0, /https:\/\/.*\.sid</); print substr($0, RSTART, RLENGTH-1); exit }' "$tmpf")
195 [ -n "$sid" ] && nuris="listen: $sid";;
196 *www.forgottenweapons.com/*)
197 ytid=$(sed -n '/<meta name="description"/ s/.*https:\/\/youtu\.be\/\([-A-Za-z0-9_]\{11\}\).*/\1/p' "$tmpf")
198 if [ -n "$ytid" ]; then
199 nuris="video: ytdl://$ytid ;"
200 nuris="$nuris metadata: gophers://codemadness.org/1/idiotbox.cgi?v=$ytid"
201 fi;;
202 *www.reddit.com*)
203 nuri="$(printf '%s\n' "${uri}" | sed "s;www.reddit.com;old.reddit.com;")"
204 nuris="old.reddit: ${nuri}"
205 fetch-uri "${nuri}" > "${tmpf}"
206 if [ -n "${uri#*www.reddit.com/r/*}" ];
207 then
208 subreddit="$(printf '%s\n' "${uri}" | cut -d / -f 5)"
209 post="$(printf '%s\n' "${uri}" | cut -d / -f 7)"
210 if [ -n "${post}" ];
211 then
212 guri="gopher://gopherddit.com/1/cgi-bin/reddit.cgi?view&${post}&${subreddit}&10"
213 else
214 guri="gopher://gopherddit.com/1/cgi-bin/reddit.cgi?menu&${subreddit}&10"
215 fi
216 nuris="${nuri} ; gopherdit: ${guri}"
217 fi
218 nocuri=0;;
219 *taz.de*)
220 newsid="$(printf '%s\n' "${uri}" | sed 's,.*\(![0-9]*\).*,\1,')"
221 if [ -n "${newsid}" ];
222 then
223 urititle="$(curl-grabtitle "${uri}")"
224 nuris="gopher://taz.de/1/${newsid}"
225 nocuri=1
226 fi;;
227 *x.com/*/status/*)
228 tid="$(printf "%s\n" "${uri}" | sed 's,.*status/\([0-9]*\)$,\1,')"
229 if [ -n "${tid}" ];
230 then
231 nuris="https://twitter-thread.com/pdf/${tid}"
232 nocuri=1
233 fi;;
234 *twitter.com*)
235 #ninstance="$(nitter-instance | sed 's,\.,\\\.,g')"
236 #nuri="$(printf "%s\n" "${uri}" | sed "s;\(mobile\.\)\{0,1\}twitter\.com;${ninstance};")"
237 fetch-uri "${uri}" > "${tmpf}"
238 urititle="$(curl-grabtitle "${uri}")"
239 #suri="$(screenshot-paste "${uri}")"
240 #nuris="nitter: ${nuri}"
241 nocuri=0;;
242 *.wikipedia.org/wiki/*)
243 if ! regeximatch "$uri" '\.(jpg,bmp,gif,png,tiff,avi,mp4,webm,mkv,pdf,ps,eps)$';
244 then
245 nuri="$(printf '%s\n' "${uri}" | sed -Ee "s;/wiki/;/api/rest_v1/page/pdf/;" -e "s;(\?|#).*$;;")"
246 nuris="$(printf 'pdf: %s\n' "${nuri}")"
247 nocuri=1
248 fi;;
249 *youtube.com/*|*youtu.be/*)
250 # Youtube is so annoying and repeatedly broken;
251 # they hate users, only expand on request.
252 if [ $dospoil -eq 1 ];
253 then
254 if [ -z "${uri##*youtu.be/*}" ] \
255 || [ -z "${uri##*/watch?v=*}" ] \
256 || [ -z "${uri##*/embed/*}" ] \
257 || [ -z "${uri##*/shorts/*}" ];
258 then
259 ytid="${uri#http*://*/watch?v=}"
260 ytid="${ytid##*embed/}"
261 ytid="${ytid##*shorts/}"
262 ytid="${ytid##*youtu.be/}"
263 ytid="${ytid%%\?*}"
264 ytid="${ytid%%&*}"
265 nuri="$(get-invidious-instance)/watch?v=${ytid}"
266 ytt="$(printf '%s\n' "${uri}" | sed -n 's/.*[&?]t=\([^&]\{1,\}\).*/\1/p')"
267 [ -n "${ytt}" ] && nuri="${nuri}&t=${ytt}"
268 else
269 ytid=""
270 nuri="$(get-invidious-instance)/${uri#https*://*/}"
271 fi
272 fetch-uri "${nuri}" > "${tmpf}"
273 urititle="$(curl-grabtitle "${nuri}")"
274 nuris="invidious: ${nuri}"
275 if [ -n "${ytid}" ];
276 then
277 sturi="$(subtitle-paste "${uri}")"
278 nuris="${nuris} ; metadata: gophers://codemadness.org/1/idiotbox.cgi?v=${ytid}"
279 fi
280 # If there was no title found, do not display.
281 [ -z "${urititle}" ] && titleend=1
282 nocuri=1
283 else
284 titleend=1
285 fi;;
286 *tv.brain.rip/???-???*)
287 nuris="$(grep 'property="og:video:secure_url' < "${tmpf}" | sed 's,.*content="\([^"]*\)".*,\1,')"
288 urititle="$(grep 'name="description' < "${tmpf}" | sed 's,.*content="\([^"]*\)".*,\1,')"
289 nocuri=1;;
290 *ifdb.org/viewgame*)
291 ifdbid="${uri##*ifdb.org/viewgame?id=}"
292 nuris="gopher://gopher.0xfa.de/1/pazz0/ifdb2/${ifdbid}.gph"
293 nocuri=1;;
294 *)
295 mimetype="$(file -b --mime-type "${tmpf}")"
296 case "${mimetype}" in
297 text/*|application/javascript) nocuri=0;;
298 esac;;
299 esac
300
301 if [ $titleend -eq 0 ];
302 then
303 if [ $nocuri -eq 0 ];
304 then
305 [ -z "${curi}" ] && curi="$(html2text < "${tmpf}" | /br/bin/bitreich-paste)"
306 outputstr="${outputstr} content: ${curi} ;"
307 fi
308
309 [ -n "${nuris}" ] && outputstr="${outputstr} ${nuris} ;"
310 [ -n "${urititle}" ] && outputstr="${outputstr} title: ${urititle} ;"
311 [ -n "${suri}" ] && outputstr="${outputstr} screen: ${suri} ;"
312 [ -n "${sturi}" ] && outputstr="${outputstr} subtitles: ${sturi} ;"
313 annna-say "${outputstr}"
314 uriexpansion=1
315 fi
316 rm -f "${tmpf}";;
317 esac
318
319 runlinkbrother=0
320 for linkbrotherchannel in $linkbrotherchannels;
321 do
322 [ "$IRC_CHANNEL" = "$linkbrotherchannel" ] && runlinkbrother=1
323 done
324 if [ $runlinkbrother -eq 1 ] && [ $nospoil -eq 0 ];
325 then
326 critique="$($ANNNA_MODBASE/linkbrother/linkbrother.sh \
327 "$ANNNA_MODBASE/linkbrother/db" \
328 "${IRC_CMD_USER}" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}")"
329 [ -n "$critique" ] && annna-say "$critique"
330 fi
331
332 case "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" in
333 "${IRC_USER}"?)
334 exclamation="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | sed "s,${IRC_USER}\(.\),\1,g")"
335 exclamationsintime=$(exclamatio "${IRC_CMD_USER}")
336 finalexclamation="${exclamation}"
337 while [ $exclamationsintime -gt 1 ];
338 do
339 finalexclamation="${finalexclamation}${exclamation}"
340 exclamationsintime=$(($exclamationsintime - 1))
341 done
342 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}${finalexclamation}";;
343 "${IRC_USER}, how old are you?")
344 age="$(ddiff ${annnabirthday} today -f "%y")"
345 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, I am ${age} years old.";;
346 "${IRC_USER}, when is your birthday?") annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, I am born on ${annnabirthday}.";;
347 "${IRC_USER}, asl"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, age: born on 1989-05-18; sex: IRC bot; location: bitreich.org; u?";;
348 "${IRC_USER}, woop")
349 # Using the same database for funny hacks.
350 exclamation="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | sed "s;${IRC_USER}, \(.\);\1;g")"
351 exclamationsintime=$(exclamatio "${IRC_CMD_USER}")
352 finalexclamation="${exclamation}"
353 while [ $exclamationsintime -gt 1 ];
354 do
355 finalexclamation="${finalexclamation} ${exclamation}"
356 exclamationsintime=$(($exclamationsintime - 1))
357 done
358 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ${finalexclamation}";;
359 "${IRC_USER}, hype")
360 # Using the same database for funny hacks.
361 exclamation="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | sed "s;${IRC_USER}, \(.\);\1;g")"
362 exclamationsintime=$(exclamatio "${IRC_CMD_USER}")
363 finalexclamation="${exclamation}"
364 while [ $exclamationsintime -gt 1 ];
365 do
366 finalexclamation="${finalexclamation} ${exclamation}"
367 exclamationsintime=$(($exclamationsintime - 1))
368 done
369 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ${finalexclamation}";;
370 *">:3"*) annna-say "OMG IT'S A LION GET IN THE CAR!";;
371 *"<3"*)
372 love "${IRC_CMD_USER}++"
373 annna-say "*o.o*";;
374 *"m(") annna-say "(－‸ლ)";;
375 *"*shrug*"*) annna-say "¯\\_(ツ)_/¯";;
376 *"*glare*"*) annna-say "ಠ_ಠ";;
377 *"*finger*"*) annna-say "╭∩╮(ಠ_ಠ)╭∩╮";;
378 *"*yolo*"*) annna-say "Yᵒᵘ Oᶰˡʸ Lᶤᵛᵉ Oᶰᶜᵉ";;
379 *":'(") annna-say "(╯︵╰,)";;
380 "Thanks ${IRC_USER}"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, you are welcome.";;
381 *" ope sorry"*|"ope sorry"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, 😃pe sorry.";;
382 "${IRC_USER}, snake"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ssSSsSssSssSsssssSSsSSSSsSssSSSSsssSSSSsssSSsssSssssSssssSSssSSsSssssSSsSSssSsssSssSSSS";;
383 "${IRC_USER}, snoke"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, snoke again?";;
384 "${IRC_USER}, amirite?") annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, Yep, you're the most correct of them all.";;
385 "${IRC_USER}, ping"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, pong.";;
386 "${IRC_USER}, how lame is my nick?") annna-say "$(lameness "${IRC_CMD_USER}")";;
387 "${IRC_USER}, ding"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, dong.";;
388 "${IRC_USER}, irly"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, I love you too.";;
389 "${IRC_USER}, bleep bloop"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, bloop bleep." ;;
390 "${IRC_USER}, snare"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, not snare again!";;
391 "${IRC_USER}, I am mad"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, we have a MAD SCIENTIST ONBOARD :>";;
392 "${IRC_USER}, I am holy"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, Holy shit this guy is totally NUTS!!!";;
393 "${IRC_USER}, please compliment me"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, you rock!";;
394 "${IRC_USER}, what the karma?") annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, gophers://bitreich.org/1/irc/karma";;
395 "${IRC_USER}, who is lovely?") annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, gophers://bitreich.org/1/irc/love";;
396 "${IRC_USER}, what the brcon score?") annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, gophers://bitreich.org/1/con/$(date +%Y)/score";;
397 "${IRC_USER}, what the shame?") annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, gophers://bitreich.org/1/irc/shame";;
398 "${IRC_USER}, please generate a password for me.") annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, as you wish: $(pwgen -B1ny 20 10 | paste -sd ' ')";;
399 *"don't care"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, $(shuf -n 1 ${idontcaredb})";;
400 "${IRC_USER}, how can I phlog on bitreich?") annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, please read: gophers://bitreich.org/0/usr/20h/phlog/2017-08-26T20-04-02-482296.md and gophers://bitreich.org/0/usr/20h/phlog/2017-08-26T20-27-40-281825.md";;
401 "${IRC_USER}, what's my type?")
402 {
403 cd /br/gopher
404 usertype="$(find memecache/type-?.png -type f \
405 | shuf -n 1 \
406 | xargs -n 1 printf "gophers://bitreich.org/9%s\n")"
407 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, your type is ${usertype}"
408 };;
409 "${IRC_USER}, please show me a video about "*)
410 word="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 37-)"
411 case "$word" in
412 *\?) word="$(printf "%s\n" "${word}" | cut -c -"$((${#word} - 1))")";;
413 esac
414 videoresult="$(idiotbox-roulette "${word}")"
415 if [ -n "${videoresult}" ];
416 then
417 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ${videoresult}"
418 else
419 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, sorry, nothing founds."
420 fi;;
421 "${IRC_USER}, what is my fortune?")
422 fortunecookie="$(fortune-cookie)"
423 [ -n "${fortunecookie}" ] && annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ${fortunecookie}";;
424 "${IRC_USER}, what is "*)
425 word="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 16-)"
426 case "$word" in
427 *\?) word="$(printf "%s\n" "${word}" | cut -c -"$((${#word} - 1))")";;
428 esac
429
430 dictserver="dict.org"
431 case "${word}" in
432 dict.org*)
433 dictserver="dict.org"
434 word="$(printf "%s\n" "${word}" | cut -c 9-)"
435 ;;
436 # parazy.de is unmaintained
437 #parazy.de*)
438 # dictserver="parazy.de"
439 # word="$(printf "%s\n" "${word}" | cut -c 10-)"
440 # ;;
441 esac
442
443 dresult="$(dictcurl "${dictserver}" "" "${word}")"
444 if [ -z "${dresult}" ];
445 then
446 puri="No match found."
447 else
448 puri="$(printf "%s\n" "${dresult}" | /br/bin/bitreich-paste)"
449 fi
450 annna-say "${puri}";;
451 "${IRC_USER}, cowsay "*)
452 word="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 15-)"
453 tmpf=$(mktemp)
454 if cowsayasaservice ${word} > ${tmpf}; then
455 curi="$(/br/bin/bitreich-paste < ${tmpf})"
456 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}: the cow said... ${curi}"
457 fi
458 rm ${tmpf} 2>/dev/null;;
459 "${IRC_USER}, please give me the unix power"*)
460 upcuri="$(unix-power)"
461 [ -n "${upcuri}" ] && annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ${upcuri}";;
462 "${IRC_USER}, please stop the last emoji prompt"*)
463 lastemojipromptpid="$(pgrep -f stable-diffusion-emoji | sort -n | tail -n 1)"
464 if [ -n "${lastemojipromptpid}" ];
465 then
466 pstree -A -p "${lastemojipromptpid}" | grep -Eow "[0-9]+" | xargs kill
467 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, I HUPed ${lastemojipromptpid} and all its children for you."
468 else
469 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, sorry, no instances found."
470 fi;;
471 "${IRC_USER}, play despacito "*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, gophers://bitreich.org/9/memecache/despacito.mkv";;
472 "nice to meet you ${IRC_USER}"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, the pleasure is on my side. :-)";;
473 "${IRC_USER}, please give me a Chuck Norris fact"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, $(chucknorris)";;
474 "${IRC_USER}, magic"*)
475 magictrick="$(magic)"
476 [ -n "${magictrick}" ] && annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ${magictrick}";;
477 "${IRC_USER}, please show me ip art"*)
478 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, please see #bitreich-tv for the magic."
479 {
480 cd $HOME/bin/modules/ip-art;
481 # Lock, so only one annna process manipulates eth0.
482 flock $HOME/bin/modules/ip-art -c "./display-file.sh ip-art.ipart"
483 } & ;;
484 "${IRC_USER}, I feel button"*)
485 buri="$(button-gen)"
486 if [ -n "${buri}" ];
487 then
488 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, like this? ${buri}"
489 else
490 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, sorry, no feelings for you today."
491 fi;;
492 "${IRC_USER}, I feel stupid"*)
493 nuri=$(darwin)
494 tmpf=$(mktemp)
495 fetch-uri "${nuri}" > "${tmpf}"
496 curi="$(9 htmlfmt < "${tmpf}" | /br/bin/bitreich-paste)"
497 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, do not feel stupid, others are more stupid: ${curi}"
498 rm ${tmpf} 2>/dev/null;;
499 "${IRC_USER}, I feel down"*)
500 postmortem="$(post-mortem | /br/bin/bitreich-paste)"
501 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, do not feel bad, others had worse days: ${postmortem}";;
502 "${IRC_USER}, I feel perl"*)
503 perlfeelings="$(perl-feelings)"
504 [ -n "${perl-feelings}" ] && annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, I feel ${perlfeelings}";;
505 "${IRC_USER}, will you be my girlfriend?") annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, $(girlfriend)";;
506 "${IRC_USER}, who fights crime?"|"${IRC_USER}, who is fighting crime?")
507 partner=$(echo $brmembers | awk '{for (i = 1; i < NF; i++) print $i}' | grep -v "^{$user}" | shuf -n 1)
508 crimefighter="$(theyfightcrime ${IRC_CMD_USER} ${partner})"
509 annna-say "${crimefighter}";;
510 "${IRC_USER}, please give me a commit message"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, $(whatthecommit)";;
511 "${IRC_USER}, please paint the irc channel.")
512 emojiuri="$(emoji-channel-history "${ANNNA_IRCBASE}/${IRC_SERVER}/${IRC_CHANNEL}")"
513 [ -n "${emojiuri}" ] && annna-say "${emojiuri}";;
514 "${IRC_USER}, birp"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, I heard a $(bird-name) bird.";;
515 "${IRC_USER}, please oneline me"*)
516 randomoneliner="$(oneliner)"
517 if [ -z "${randomoneliner}" ];
518 then
519 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, the service failed. Please redial to your BOL account."
520 else
521 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ${randomoneliner}"
522 fi;;
523 *"what's app?")
524 maemoapp="$(whatsapp)"
525 [ -n "${maemoapp}" ] && annna-say "Have you tried? ${maemoapp}";;
526 "${IRC_USER}, man "*|"${IRC_USER}, man "*)
527 exp="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 12- | sed 's,\t, ,g')"
528 dresult="$(COLUMNS=80 man "${exp}" 2>/dev/null)"
529 if [ "$dresult" ];
530 then
531 puri="$(printf "%s" "${dresult}" | /br/bin/bitreich-paste)"
532 else
533 puri="No matches found."
534 fi
535 annna-say "${puri}";;
536 "${IRC_USER}, please pray for me"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, here, for you: gophers://bitreich.org/9/memecache/llaminim.mkv";;
537 "${IRC_USER}, nigger."|*nigger*|*NIGGER*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, don't use the $(nword)!";;
538 "${IRC_USER}, why was I breached?")
539 breachtext="$(why-was-i-breached)"
540 [ -n "${breachtext}" ] && annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ${breachtext}";;
541 "${IRC_USER}, please be responsible about "*)
542 word="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 36- | sed 's,\t, ,g')"
543 suri="$(responsibility "${word}" | bitreich-paste)"
544 annna-say "${suri}";;
545 "${IRC_USER}, please say "*)
546 word="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 19- | sed 's,\t, ,g')"
547 suri="$(printf "%s\n" "${word}" | bitreich-speak)"
548 annna-say "${suri}";;
549 "${IRC_USER}, please zombie say "*)
550 word="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 26- | sed 's,\t, ,g')"
551 suri="$(printf "%s\n" "${word}" | zombie -e | bitreich-speak)"
552 annna-say "${suri}";;
553 "${IRC_USER}, please unzombie "*)
554 word="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 24- | sed 's,\t, ,g')"
555 suri="$(printf "%s\n" "${word}" | zombie -d)"
556 annna-say "${suri}";;
557 "${IRC_USER}, please zombie "*)
558 word="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 22- | sed 's,\t, ,g')"
559 suri="$(printf "%s\n" "${word}" | zombie -e)"
560 annna-say "${suri}";;
561 "${IRC_USER}, please ghost say "*)
562 word="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 25- | sed 's,\t, ,g')"
563 suri="$(printf "%s\n" "${word}" | ghost -e | bitreich-speak)"
564 annna-say "${suri}";;
565 "${IRC_USER}, please unghost "*)
566 word="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 23- | sed 's,\t, ,g')"
567 suri="$(printf "%s\n" "${word}" | ghost -d)"
568 annna-say "${suri}";;
569 "${IRC_USER}, please ghost "*)
570 word="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 21- | sed 's,\t, ,g')"
571 suri="$(printf "%s\n" "${word}" | ghost -e)"
572 annna-say "${suri}";;
573 "${IRC_USER}, please pohlish "*)
574 word="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 23- | sed 's,\t, ,g')"
575 suri="$(pohlcode.awk "${word}" | head -n 1)"
576 annna-say "${suri}";;
577 "${IRC_USER}, please cunei "*)
578 word="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 21- | sed 's,\t, ,g')"
579 suri="$(int2cunei "${word}" | head -n 1)"
580 annna-say "${suri}";;
581 "${IRC_USER}, what is up with gopher man?");; #TODO
582 "${IRC_USER}, what can I cook with "*)
583 ingredients="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 29- | sed 's,\t, ,g')"
584 case "$ingredients" in
585 *\?) ingredients="$(printf "%s\n" "${ingredients}" | cut -c -"$(($(expr length "${ingredients}") - 1))")";;
586 esac
587 results="$(fridge-recipe-search "${ingredients}")"
588 if [ -n "${results}" ];
589 then
590 puri="$(printf "%s\n" "${results}" | bitreich-paste | sed 's,0p,1p,')"
591 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, here are some recipes: ${puri}"
592 else
593 gptchefrecipe="$(gpt-chef "${ingredients}")"
594 if [ -n "${gptchefrecipe}" ];
595 then
596 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, there was no ready-made recipe, so maybe this is an idea: ${gptchefrecipe}"
597 if [ $(pgrep -f stable-diffusion-emoji 2>/dev/null | wc -l) -lt 3 ];
598 then
599 {
600 emojiuri="$(stable-diffusion-emoji "${gptchefrecipe}")"
601 if [ -n "${emojiuri}" ];
602 then
603 annna-say "${emojiuri}"
604 fi
605 } &
606 fi
607 else
608 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, I could not find any recipes for you."
609 fi
610 fi;;
611 "${IRC_USER}, gpt "*)
612 prompt="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 12- | sed 's,\t, ,g')"
613 {
614 annna-say "$(gpt "${prompt}. Please answer short and precise.")"
615 } & ;;
616 "${IRC_USER}, wolfram is "*)
617 word="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 19- | sed 's,\t, ,g')"
618 case "$word" in
619 *\?) word="$(printf "%s\n" "${word}" | cut -c -"$(($(expr length "${word}") - 1))")";;
620 esac
621 puri=""
622 dresult="$(printf "/wolfram\t%s\r\n" "${word}" \
623 | nc magical.fish 70 \
624 | awk '/iAnswer:/,/iAsk/' \
625 | grep -v '^i ' \
626 | head -n -1 \
627 | tail -n +2 \
628 | sed 's,i\(.*\)fake\texample.com.*,\1,;s,[ \t]*$,,')"
629 if [ -n "$dresult" ];
630 then
631 case "${dresult}" in
632 b*) dresult="$(printf "%s\n" "${dresult}" \
633 | tr '\n' ' ' \
634 | sed "s,^b',,;s,' $,," \
635 | sed 's,^b",,;s," $,,' \
636 | sed 's,\\n,\n,g;s,\\t,\t,g')"
637 ;;
638 *) dresult="$(printf "%s\n" "${dresult}" \
639 | sed 's,\([a-zA-Z]\)$,\1 ,' \
640 | tr -d '\n')"
641 ;;
642 esac
643 wcl="$(printf "%s" "${dresult}" | wc -l)"
644 if [ $wcl -gt 1 ];
645 then
646 puri="$(printf "%s" "${dresult}" | /br/bin/bitreich-paste)"
647 else
648 puri="${dresult}"
649 fi
650 else
651 puri="No matches found."
652 fi
653 annna-say -- "${puri}";;
654 # Emulate https://threats.kaspersky.com/en/threat/IRC-Worm.DOS.Septic/
655 "${IRC_USER}, pray"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, I Obey my master! long live satan";;
656 "${IRC_USER}, sacrifice"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, Your word is my command, Power to satan!";;
657 "${IRC_USER}, please scare me"*) annna-say "$(halloween)" & ;;
658 "${IRC_USER}, how drunk is "*)
659 {
660 drunknick="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" \
661 | sed 's,.*how drunk is \(.*\),\1,' \
662 | tr -d '?')"
663 drunkness="$(drunk-meter "${ANNNA_IRCBASE}/${IRC_SERVER}/${IRC_CHANNEL}/out" "${drunknick}")"
664 if [ -n "${drunkness}" ];
665 then
666 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ${drunknick} is ${drunkness} drunk."
667 fi
668 } & ;;
669 "${IRC_USER}, how do I "*)
670 {
671 gptprompt="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" \
672 | sed 's,.*how do I \(.*\),\1,' \
673 | tr -d '?')"
674 gpturi="$(gpt "how do I ${gptprompt}" | bitreich-paste)"
675 if [ -n "${gpturi}" ];
676 then
677 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, try this: ${gpturi}"
678 fi
679 } & ;;
680 "${IRC_USER}, weather at "*|"${IRC_USER}, weather in "*)
681 {
682 weatherplace="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" \
683 | sed 's,.*weather .. \(.*\),\1,' \
684 | tr -d '?')"
685 if weathertext="$(weather "${weatherplace}")"
686 then
687 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, the weather at ${weatherplace} is ${weathertext}"
688 else
689 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, there is no weather at ${weatherplace}."
690 fi
691 } & ;;
692 "${IRC_USER}, funny weather at "*|"${IRC_USER}, funny weather in "*)
693 {
694 weatherplace="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" \
695 | sed 's,.*funny weather .. \(.*\),\1,' \
696 | tr -d '?')"
697 personality="funny-weather-reporter"
698 preprompt="$(cat ${ANNNA_MODBASE}/prompt-agents/${personality}.prompt.txt)"
699 if weathertext="$(weather "${weatherplace}")"
700 then
701 prompt="$(printf "%s\n" "${weathertext}" | cut -d' ' -f 2- | sed 's,\t, ,g')"
702 {
703 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, $(gpt "System: ${preprompt}\n User: ${prompt}\n Bot:")"
704 } &
705 else
706 weathertext="there is no weather at ${weatherplace}"
707 prompt="${weathertext}"
708 {
709 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, $(gpt "System: ${preprompt}\n User: ${prompt}\n Bot:")"
710 } &
711 fi
712 } & ;;
713 "${IRC_USER}, color weather at "*|"${IRC_USER}, color weather in "*)
714 {
715 weatherplace="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" \
716 | sed 's,.*color weather .. \(.*\),\1,' \
717 | tr -d '?')"
718 personality="color-weather-reporter"
719 preprompt="$(cat ${ANNNA_MODBASE}/prompt-agents/${personality}.prompt.txt)"
720 if weathertext="$(weather "${weatherplace}")"
721 then
722 prompt="$(printf "%s\n" "${weathertext}" | cut -d' ' -f 2- | sed 's,\t, ,g')"
723 {
724 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, $(gpt "System:${preprompt}\nUser:${prompt}\nBot:")"
725 } &
726 else
727 weathertext="there is no weather at ${weatherplace}"
728 prompt="${weathertext}"
729 {
730 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, $(gpt "System:${preprompt}\nUser:${prompt}\nBot:")"
731 } &
732 fi
733 } & ;;
734 "${IRC_USER}, METAR for "*|"${IRC_USER}, metar for "*|"${IRC_USER}, metar for "*|"${IRC_USER}, METAR for "*)
735 resp=$(metar "$(printf '%.4s\n' "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT##* }")")
736 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ${resp}";;
737 "${IRC_USER}, how discriminating is "*)
738 word="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 30- | sed 's,\t, ,g')"
739 case "$word" in
740 *\?) word="$(printf "%s\n" "${word}" | cut -c -"$(($(expr length "${word}") - 1))")";;
741 esac
742 newword="$(discrimination-filter "${word}")"
743 if [ "${newword}" = "${word}" ];
744 then
745 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, it is ok."
746 else
747 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, it should be: ${newword}"
748 fi;;
749 "${IRC_USER}, are "*)
750 case "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" in
751 *" in love?")
752 words="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | sed 's,.*are \(.*\) and \(.*\) in love?,\1 \2,')"
753 lovedistance="$(printf "%s * 100\n" "$(fstrcmp ${words})" | bc | cut -d'.' -f 1)"
754 if [ $lovedistance -gt 15 ];
755 then
756 annna-say 'Yes!!! Pure <3 <3'
757 else
758 annna-say "No."
759 fi;;
760 esac;;
761 "${IRC_USER}, is "*)
762 aitext="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 7- | sed 's,\t, ,g')"
763 airesult="$(printf "%s\n" "${aitext}" | josuah-ai)"
764 [ -n "${airesult}" ] && annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER},${airesult}";;
765 [Oo]"k, ${IRC_USER}"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, I am not a consumer device.";;
766 "${IRC_USER}, please shoot "*|"${IRC_USER}, plese shoot "*)
767 word="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 21-)"
768 annna-say "${word}, #pewpew gophers://bitreich.org/9/memecache/pewpew.mp4";;
769 "${IRC_USER}, please quinq.") annna-say "┻━┻ ︵╰(°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻";;
770 "${IRC_USER}, please flip "*)
771 word="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 20-)"
772 updownword="$(updown "${word}")"
773 annna-say "(╯°□°)╯ ${word} ︵ ${updownword}";;
774 "${IRC_USER}, please crystal math "*)
775 math="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 28-)"
776 crystaluri="$(crystal-math "${math}")"
777 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, please see ${crystaluri}";;
778 "${IRC_USER}, please australize "*)
779 word="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 26-)"
780 updownword="$(updown "${word}")"
781 annna-say "${word} -> ${updownword}";;
782 "${IRC_USER}, wtf "*)
783 word="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 11-)"
784 wtfword="$(wtf "${word}" 2>/dev/null)"
785 [ -n "${wtfword}" ] && annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ${wtfword}";;
786 "${IRC_USER}, please give me a good band name"*) annna-say "$(bandname-gen | shuf | head -n 1)";;
787 "${IRC_USER}, I feel conspicuous"*) annna-say "Maybe declare this: $(manifesto-gen | bitreich-paste)";;
788 "${IRC_USER}, I am horny"*) annna-say "Here is some intellectual porn for you: $(bithub-gen)";;
789 "${IRC_USER}, please turn on "*)
790 word="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 22-)"
791 annna-say "☞ ⏻ ${word}";;
792 "${IRC_USER}, please turn me on"*) annna-say "☞ ⏻ ${IRC_CMD_USER}";;
793 "${IRC_USER}, I'm game bored.")
794 gamelink="$(abandonware-random-game)"
795 if [ -z "${gamelink}" ];
796 then
797 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, sorry I have found nothing for you."
798 else
799 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, have you tried ${gamelink} ?"
800 fi;;
801 "${IRC_USER}, I need a waifu"*)
802 waifuuris="$(waifu-gen)"
803 [ -n "${waifuuris}" ] && annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ${waifuuris}";;
804 "${IRC_USER}, I need an anime"*)
805 animeuri="$(anime-gen)"
806 [ -n "${animeuri}" ] && annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ${animeuri}";;
807 "${IRC_USER}, I'm gopher bored"*)
808 randomlink="$(/br/bin/bitreich-lawn-random-link)"
809 linktype="$(printf "%s\n" "${randomlink}" | cut -d '|' -f1 | cut -c2-)"
810 linktext="$(printf "%s\n" "${randomlink}" | cut -d '|' -f2)"
811 linksel="$(printf "%s\n" "${randomlink}" | cut -d '|' -f3)"
812 linkserver="$(printf "%s\n" "${randomlink}" | cut -d '|' -f4)"
813 linkport="$(printf "%s\n" "${randomlink}" | cut -d '|' -f5 | cut -d']' -f1)"
814 outtext="$(printf "%s - gopher://%s" "$linktext" "$linkserver")"
815 [ "$linkport" != "70" ] && [ "$linkport" != "port" ] && outtext="$(printf "%s:%s" "$outtext" "$linkport")"
816 [ -n "$linksel" ] && outtext="$(printf "%s/%s%s" "$outtext" "$linktype" "$linksel")"
817 annna-say "$outtext";;
818 "${IRC_USER}, wb"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ty! I am so happy to be here. :)";;
819 "${IRC_USER}, welcome back"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, thank you! I am so happy to be here. :)";;
820 "${IRC_USER}, I love you"*) annna-say $'\001ACTION blushes\001';;
821 "${IRC_USER}, bon"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, $(bonjour) !";;
822 "${IRC_USER}, salut"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, Salutations camarade !";;
823 "${IRC_USER}, what's up?") annna-say "$(ecl -shell /home/solene/gopher/bin/generator.lisp)";;
824 "${IRC_USER}, what's down?") annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, we all love you.";;
825 $'\001'"ACTION cancels "*)
826 mobtarget="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | sed 's,.*ACTION cancels \(.*\)\x01,\1,')"
827 cancel-target "${mobtarget}"
828 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, I cancelled ${mobtarget} for you. ( gophers://bitreich.org/I/memecache/cancel-meteor.jpg )";;
829 $'\001'"ACTION pokes ${IRC_USER}"$'\001') annna-say "$(echo -e '\001')ACTION pokes ${IRC_CMD_USER}$(echo -e '\001')";;
830 "${IRC_USER}, please show me the mob"*|"${IRC_USER}, what are the mob"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, $(get-cancel-list)";;
831 "${IRC_USER}, I feel sick"*)
832 newsstr="$(cd /br/gopher/hypochondria && ./hypochondria -s random)"
833 annna-say "You could have ${newsstr}! Be careful!";;
834 *"oh hai"*|*"ohai"*|*"ohhai"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, hai! How is your sex life?";;
835 "o/"|"o/ "*|"\o"|"\o "*|"o7"|"o7 "*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}";;
836 "\m/"|"\m/ "*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ";;
837 *"*waves*"*|*"*wave*"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, *wave*";;
838 "twtcs"*|"TWTCS"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, maybe: https://constitution.congress.gov/constitution/";;
839 "twss"*|"TWSS"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, no, I didn't.";;
840 *"cows are nice"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, 'Cows are nice, unless you are a blade of grass.' -- Mr. Qi Ng (2023)";;
841 "${IRC_USER}, please make me a coffee"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ☕";;
842 "${IRC_USER}, please tech hype me"*) annna-say "$(tech-hype)";;
843 "${IRC_USER}, please french hype me"*) annna-say "$(french-hype)";;
844 "${IRC_USER}, please coffee read "*)
845 readtarget="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -c 27-)"
846 horostr="$($HOME/scm/bullshit/horoscope)"
847 annna-say "${readtarget}, ${horostr}";;
848 "${IRC_USER}, what's my horoscope?") annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, $($HOME/scm/bullshit/horoscope)";;
849 "${IRC_USER}, what should I cook"*)
850 recipestr="$(based.recipe)"
851 if [ -n "${recipestr}" ];
852 then
853 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ${recipestr}"
854 else
855 gptchefrecipe="$(gpt-chef "something random")"
856 if [ -n "${gptchefrecipe}" ];
857 then
858 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ${gptchefrecipe}"
859 if [ $(pgrep -f stable-diffusion-emoji 2>/dev/null | wc -l) -lt 3 ];
860 then
861 {
862 emojiuri="$(stable-diffusion-emoji "${gptchefrecipe}")"
863 if [ -n "${emojiuri}" ];
864 then
865 annna-say "${emojiuri}"
866 fi
867 } &
868 fi
869 else
870 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, I have no recommendation for you today."
871 fi
872 fi;;
873 # parazyd.org is unmaintained
874 #"${IRC_USER}, what's my future?")
875 # puri="$(sacc gopher://parazyd.org/0/tarot.cgi | /br/bin/bitreich-paste)"
876 # annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, your future is here: ${puri}"
877 # ;;
878 "${IRC_USER}, haha"*)
879 {
880 wuri="$(github-haha)"
881 [ -n "${wuri}" ] && annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, haha ${wuri}"
882 } & ;;
883 "${IRC_USER}, meow"*)
884 # https://catgps.wvd.io support
885 nmeows=$(($RANDOM % 14))
886 meows="Meow"
887 for i in $(seq $nmeows);
888 do
889 meows="$meows meow"
890 done
891 if [ $nmeows -lt 4 ];
892 then
893 meows="$meows!"
894 else
895 meows="$meows."
896 fi
897 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ${meows}";;
898 "${IRC_USER}, how many memes do you know?") annna-say "I know $(hashtagcount) memes: gophers://bitreich.org/1/meme/count";;
899 "${IRC_USER}, please show me your memes"*)
900 puri="$(printf "%s" "$(hashtags)" | /br/bin/bitreich-paste)"
901 annna-say "Here are my memes: ${puri}";;
902 "${IRC_USER}, please show me the victims"*)
903 puri="$(printf "%s" "$(hashtags)" | grep victim | /br/bin/bitreich-paste)"
904 annna-say "Here are the victims: ${puri}";;
905 "${IRC_USER}, please distro-hop with me"*)
906 ndistro="$(curl -s 'https://distrowatch.com/dwres.php?resource=popularity' \
907 | grep phr2 \
908 | sed 's,.*href="\(.*\)".*,\1,' \
909 | sort | uniq | shuf -n 1)"
910 annna-say "How about https://distrowatch.com/${ndistro} ?";;
911 "${IRC_USER}, please show me your Macron"*) annna-say "gophers://bitreich.org/0/ascii/macron.vt";;
912 "${IRC_USER}, release the Kraken"*) annna-say "Here it is! gophers://bitreich.org/0/memecache/kraken.vt";;
913 "${IRC_USER}, where is your source?") annna-say "Here is my precious source: git://bitreich.org/annna ";;
914 "${IRC_USER}, release the Quacken!") annna-say "Quack Quack! gophers://bitreich.org/9/memecache/release-the-quacken.mkv";;
915 "${IRC_USER}, be cool"*)
916 case "$(($RANDOM % 5))" in
917 0) annna-say "(⌐■_■)";;
918 1) annna-say "(▰˘◡˘▰)";;
919 2) annna-say "(▀ Ĺ▀ )̄";;
920 3) annna-say "(▀Ĺ▀ )";;
921 *) annna-say "I can't be cool! gophers://bitreich.org/9/memecache/i-cant-be-cool.mp3";;
922 esac;;
923 "${IRC_USER}, please cheer"*)
924 case "$(($RANDOM % 2))" in
925 0) annna-say '~\o/~';;
926 *) annna-say '✺◟( ° ʖ °)◞✺';;
927 esac;;
928 "${IRC_USER}, please give me a fish"*)
929 case "$(($RANDOM % 2))" in
930 0) annna-say '<><';;
931 *) annna-say '><>';;
932 esac;;
933 "${IRC_USER}, run"*) annna-say 'ᕕ(ಠ_ಠ)ᕗ';;
934 "${IRC_USER}, be cute"*)
935 case "$(($RANDOM % 4))" in
936 0) annna-say ' (\ /)' && sleep 0.1
937 annna-say ' (. .)' && sleep 0.1
938 annna-say ' C(") (")';;
939 1) annna-say ' (\-/)' && sleep 0.1
940 annna-say " (='.'=)" && sleep 0.1
941 annna-say ' (")-(")o';;
942 2) annna-say ' ( ) ( )' && sleep 0.1
943 annna-say ' (>•.•<)' && sleep 0.1
944 annna-say ' (") (")' && sleep 0.1;;
945 *) annna-say ' (\ (\' && sleep 0.1
946 annna-say " (=' :')" && sleep 0.1
947 annna-say ' (, (") (")';;
948 esac;;
949 "${IRC_USER}, 8ball "*)
950 eightballanswer="$(8ball)"
951 [ -n "${eightballanswer}" ] && annna-say "${eightballanswer}";;
952 "${IRC_USER}, email "*)
953 findsyou="$(shuf -n 1 "${ANNNA_MODBASE}/finds-you/finds_you.txt")"
954 [ -n "${findsyou}" ] && annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, I hope this email ${findsyou}";;
955 "${IRC_USER}, please throw a coin for me.")
956 case "$((($RANDOM % 2) + 1))" in
957 1) annna-say "face";;
958 2) annna-say "number";;
959 esac;;
960 "${IRC_USER}, please quantum roll d2 for me"*)
961 qroll="$(($(/home/20h/scm/quantum-rng/quantum-rng) + 1))"
962 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ${qroll} [1d2(scores:[${qroll}])]";;
963 "${IRC_USER}, please roll "*" for me"*)
964 q="${text#* roll }"
965 q="${q%for*}"
966
967 # https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dice_notation
968 # six-sided dice one time
969 [ -z "${q}" ] && q="d6"
970 [ "${q}" = "a die " ] && q="d6"
971 [ "${q}" = "dice " ] && q="d6"
972
973 dicescore="$(dice "${q}")"
974 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ${dicescore}";;
975 "${IRC_USER}, please tell me your favourite flower"*) annna-say "My favourite flower is the beer flower.";;
976 "${IRC_USER}, please tell me your favourite color"*) annna-say "My favourite color is yellow.";;
977 "${IRC_USER}, please clap for me"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, *clap* *clap* *clap*";;
978 "${IRC_USER}, which city does not exist?")
979 cityuri="$(this-city-does-not-exist)"
980 if [ -n "${cityuri}" ];
981 then
982 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, this one: ${cityuri}"
983 else
984 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, none."
985 fi;;
986 [Ff]"or humanity"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, for humanity! gophers://bitreich.org/0/memecache/annna-rchism.txt";;
987 [Hh]"ack the planet"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, hack the planet!" ;;
988 [Ll]"ong live gopher"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, long live gopher!";;
989 ":)"|":))"|":)))"|":-)"|":-))"|":-)))"|":--)"|":--))"|":--)))"|":---)"|":----)"|"llol"|"lllol") annna-say -- "$(smile)";;
990 "${IRC_USER}, please dance."|"\\o/"|"\^o^/") annna-say -- "$(dance-moves-gen)";;
991 "${IRC_USER}, let us celebrate!"|"/o/"|"\o\\") annna-say -- "$(dance-moves-gen -m)";;
992 "${IRC_USER}, please egyptian dance."|"${IRC_USER}, let us egyptian celebrate!"|"~o~"|"|o|") annna-say -- "$(dance-moves-gen -e)";;
993 "${IRC_USER}, please stamp this letter for me"*) annna-say -- "${IRC_CMD_USER}, here: 🖃 ";;
994 "${IRC_USER}, please do the graveyard smash"*)
995 annna-say -- "( つ ･ᴗ･)つ"
996 annna-say -- "ς ( ･ᴗ･ ς )"
997 annna-say -- "It did the mash\\ It did the ~~MONSTER MASH~~\\ It was a smash\\ It was a ~~GRAVEYARD SMASH~~";;
998 "${IRC_USER}, boo"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, 👻";;
999 "${IRC_USER}, W3C"*|"${IRC_USER}, w3c"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, 🕸️ 🕷️ 🕸️";;
1000 "${IRC_USER}, pumpkin"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, 🎃";;
1001 "${IRC_USER}, trick or treat"*|"${IRC_USER}, treat or trick"*)
1002 annna-say "Wait for it. Old annnama is searching ..."
1003 {
1004 sleeptime="$(( $RANDOM % 120 + 10 ))"
1005 if [ $sleeptime -gt 60 ];
1006 then
1007 sleep "$(( $RANDOM % 30 + 20 ))"
1008 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, *swish* *swish* old annnama is still searching."
1009 sleeptime="$(( $RANDOM % 60 + 10 ))"
1010 fi
1011 sleep $sleeptime
1012
1013 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, $(trick-or-treat)"
1014 } & ;;
1015 "${IRC_USER}, please dance with me"*)
1016 if [ $(($RANDOM % 2)) -gt 0 ];
1017 then
1018 annna-say "I am not that kind of woman."
1019 else
1020 annna-say "Thank you! Let us dance! :-D"
1021 fi;;
1022 "${IRC_USER}, please tell me who is your favourite pleasure man"*) annna-say "My favourite pleasure man is of course Gunther!";;
1023 "${IRC_USER}, make me a sandwich"*) annna-say "No.";;
1024 "${IRC_USER}, sudo make me a sandwich"*) annna-say "Humans are no objects.";;
1025 "${IRC_USER}, please make me a sandwich"*) annna-say "Maybe.";;
1026 "${IRC_USER}, sudo please make me a sandwich"*) annna-say "Here is your sandwich.";;
1027 "${IRC_USER}, I feel unsure about my health.")
1028 healthadvice="$(health-advice)"
1029 [ -n "${healthadvice}" ] && annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ${healthadvice}";;
1030 "${IRC_USER}, bonjour !") annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, bonjour !";;
1031 *" pets ${IRC_USER}"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, *brrrrr*";;
1032 "${IRC_USER}, please give me a penis extension"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, here: $(penis-extension)";;
1033 "${IRC_USER}, please bobbitize me"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, here: $(bobbitize)";;
1034 "${IRC_USER}, please give me a baguette extension"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, here: $(baguette-extension)";;
1035 "${IRC_USER}, please give me an allah extension"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, here: $(allah-extension)";;
1036 "${IRC_USER}, please pull my finger"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, you are disgusting.";;
1037 "${IRC_USER}, what's up in Japan?") annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, see for yourself: https://nhk3.mov3.co/hls/nhk.m3u8";;
1038 "${IRC_USER}, please mqtt"*)
1039 mqtturi="$(printf '%s\n' "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -d' ' -f 3)"
1040 case "${mqtturi}" in
1041 mqtt:*);; #mqtt:// full URI specified
1042 *) mqtturi="mqtts://bitreich:oogui3queex&o9zaekah@bitreich.org/${mqtturi#mqtt}";;
1043 esac
1044 msg="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -d' ' -f 4-)"
1045 printf "${msg}\n" | mosquitto_pub -L "${mqtturi}" -l;;
1046 *[Zz]"uckerberg"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, did you mean gophers://bitreich.org/9/memecache/mark-suckerberg.mp4 ?";;
1047 "${IRC_USER}, please pick one of: "*)
1048 pick="$(printf '%s\n' "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" \
1049 | sed 's/.*please pick one of: //' \
1050 | tr ',' '\n' \
1051 | tr -d ' ' \
1052 | sort -R \
1053 | head -n 1)"
1054 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, I think ${pick} is the best option.";;
1055 "${IRC_USER}, please play some Bach"*)
1056 midifile="$(find . /home/annna/bin/modules/midi-media/bach -name '*.mid' \
1057 | sort -R \
1058 | head -n 1)"
1059 outfile="/br/gopher/midi/${midifile##*/}.ogg"
1060 midi-play "$midifile" >"$outfile" && annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, gophers://bitreich.org/9/midi/${outfile##*/}";;
1061 "${IRC_USER}, please 3d "*)
1062 args=$(echo ${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT} | cut -d' ' -f 4-)
1063 outfile=$(blender-effect $args)
1064 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, gophers://bitreich.org/I/memecache/3d/${outfile}";;
1065 # https://ednaundharvey.fandom.com/de/wiki/Droggelbecher
1066 "${IRC_USER}, droggelbecher"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, Droggelbecher!";;
1067 "${IRC_USER}, thanks"*|"${IRC_USER}, thx"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, you're welcome.";;
1068 "${IRC_USER}, please simulate "*" simulator"*)
1069 q="${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT#* please simulate }"
1070 q="${q% simulator*}"
1071 outpath="/br/gopher/p/"
1072 {
1073 if outfile="$(simulate-simulator "$q")"
1074 then
1075 mv "${outfile}" "${outpath}/"
1076 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, gophers://bitreich.org/I/p/${outfile}"
1077 fi
1078 } & ;;
1079 "${IRC_USER}, can "*" certify itself?")
1080 q="${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT#* can }"
1081 q="${q% certify*}"
1082 {
1083 # host:port is needed for tlsgrab
1084 curi="$(tlsgrab "${q}")"
1085 if [ -n "${curi}" ];
1086 then
1087 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, let us see the certificate: ${curi}"
1088 fi
1089 } & ;;
1090 "${IRC_USER}, please mine "*" bitreichcoin"*)
1091 q="${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT#* please mine }"
1092 q="${q% bitreichcoin*}"
1093 curi="$(bitreichcoin "$q" | /br/bin/bitreich-paste)"
1094 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, please don't spend it all at once: ${curi}";;
1095 "${IRC_USER}, please hug me.") annna-say "$(echo -e '\001')ACTION hugs ${IRC_CMD_USER}$(echo -e '\001')";;
1096 "${IRC_USER}, please hug "*" for me.")
1097 huggee="${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT#* please hug }"
1098 huggee="${huggee% for me*}"
1099 [ -n "${huggee}" ] && annna-say "$(echo -e '\001')ACTION hugs ${huggee}$(echo -e '\001')";;
1100 "${IRC_USER}, how many fucks were given?") annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, current fucks given: 0.0";;
1101 "${IRC_USER}, please slam the door.") annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, *BANG*";;
1102 "${IRC_USER}, what is my credit score?") annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, your credit score is 0.";;
1103 "${IRC_USER}, please give me a cookie.")
1104 cookie="$(cookie)"
1105 [ -n "${cookie}" ] && annna-say "$(echo -e '\001')ACTION gives ${IRC_CMD_USER} a ${cookie} cookie$(echo -e '\001')";;
1106 "${IRC_USER}, please help"*) annna-say -c "${IRC_CMD_USER}" "See git://bitreich.org/annna for my commands.";;
1107 "${IRC_USER}, please meme meme meme me"*)
1108 randomtag=2
1109 while [ $randomtag -gt 0 ];
1110 do
1111 rtag="$(printf "%s\n" "$(hashtags)" | shuf -n 1)"
1112 tagname=""
1113 taguri=""
1114 for tag in ${rtag};
1115 do
1116 [ -z "${tagname}" ] && tagname="${tag}" && continue
1117 taguri="${tag}"
1118 done
1119 annna-say "${tagname}: ${taguri}"
1120 randomtag=$((randomtag - 1))
1121 done;;
1122 "${IRC_USER}, what's the wheelchair shooter meme again?")
1123 tagname="#scrollby"
1124 tagline="$(printf "%s\n" "$(hashtags)" | grep "^${tagname} ")"
1125 tagname="$(printf "%s\n" "${tagline}" | cut -d ' ' -f 1)"
1126 taguri="$(printf "%s\n" "${tagline}" | cut -d ' ' -f 2-)"
1127 annna-say "${tagname}: ${taguri}";;
1128 "${IRC_USER}, TIL "*|"${IRC_USER}, til "*)
1129 minimum_learned_len=12
1130 offset=$(( ${#IRC_USER} + 6 ))
1131 learned="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" \
1132 | cut -c $offset- \
1133 | sed 's,\t, ,g')"
1134 if [ ${#learned} -le $minimum_learned_len ];
1135 then
1136 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, can you explain better what you learned?"
1137 else
1138 result="$(til ${IRC_CMD_USER} "${learned}")"
1139 if [ $? -eq 0 ];
1140 then
1141 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ${result}"
1142 fi
1143 fi;;
1144 "${IRC_USER}, what have I learned?")
1145 if result=$(til-user ${IRC_CMD_USER});
1146 then
1147 annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, ${result}"
1148 fi;;
1149 esac
1150
1151 for person in "${!personalities[@]}";
1152 do case "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT,,}" in
1153 "${person}, "*)
1154 personality="${personalities[${person}]}"
1155 preprompt="$(cat ${ANNNA_MODBASE}/prompt-agents/${personality}.prompt.txt)"
1156 prompt="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -d' ' -f 2- | sed 's,\t, ,g')"
1157 annna-say "$(gpt "System: ${preprompt}\n User: ${prompt}\n Bot:")" &
1158 esac done
1159
1160 case "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" in
1161 "${IRC_USER}, please antidepressant #"*|\
1162 "${IRC_USER}, please amplify #"*|\
1163 "${IRC_USER}, please amsterdamify #"*|\
1164 "${IRC_USER}, please banjo #"*|\
1165 "${IRC_USER}, please bounce #"*|\
1166 "${IRC_USER}, please breakingnews #"*|\
1167 "${IRC_USER}, please celtify #"*|\
1168 "${IRC_USER}, please concatenate #"*|\
1169 "${IRC_USER}, please crimetv #"*|\
1170 "${IRC_USER}, please curb #"*|\
1171 "${IRC_USER}, please daybowbow #"*|\
1172 "${IRC_USER}, please deathmetal #"*|\
1173 "${IRC_USER}, please developers #"*|\
1174 "${IRC_USER}, please dontdoit #"*|\
1175 "${IRC_USER}, please dontsaytoyourmother #"*|\
1176 "${IRC_USER}, please doomify #"*|\
1177 "${IRC_USER}, please dutchapprove #"*|\
1178 "${IRC_USER}, please french #"*|\
1179 "${IRC_USER}, please FRENCH #"*|\
1180 "${IRC_USER}, please imam #"*|\
1181 "${IRC_USER}, please lop #"*|\
1182 "${IRC_USER}, please loop #"*|\
1183 "${IRC_USER}, please looop #"*|\
1184 "${IRC_USER}, please loooop #"*|\
1185 "${IRC_USER}, please mow #"*|\
1186 "${IRC_USER}, please namflashback #"*|\
1187 "${IRC_USER}, please news #"*|\
1188 "${IRC_USER}, please pullmyfinger #"*|\
1189 "${IRC_USER}, please putin #"*|\
1190 "${IRC_USER}, please reverse #"*|\
1191 "${IRC_USER}, please richardstrauss #"*|\
1192 "${IRC_USER}, please ritual #"*|\
1193 "${IRC_USER}, please sadviolin #"*|\
1194 "${IRC_USER}, please science #"*|\
1195 "${IRC_USER}, please scrollify #"*|\
1196 "${IRC_USER}, please sendtohell #"*|\
1197 "${IRC_USER}, please sexify #"*|\
1198 "${IRC_USER}, please slavify #"*|\
1199 "${IRC_USER}, please slowdown #"*|\
1200 "${IRC_USER}, please smith #"*|\
1201 "${IRC_USER}, please speedup #"*|\
1202 "${IRC_USER}, please techno #"*|\
1203 "${IRC_USER}, please technodrugs #"*|\
1204 "${IRC_USER}, please thin #"*|\
1205 "${IRC_USER}, please torture #"*|\
1206 "${IRC_USER}, please tshirt #"*|\
1207 "${IRC_USER}, please trumpapprove #"*|\
1208 "${IRC_USER}, please USAUSA #"*|\
1209 "${IRC_USER}, please USA #"*|\
1210 "${IRC_USER}, please usa #"*|\
1211 "${IRC_USER}, please wat #"*|\
1212 "${IRC_USER}, please widen #"*|\
1213 "${IRC_USER}, please ww1 #"*|\
1214 "${IRC_USER}, please yellow #"*|\
1215 "${IRC_USER}, please zucc #"*|\
1216 "${IRC_USER}, please random #"*)
1217 hashtag="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | sed 's/.*#//; s/ .*//' )"
1218 recipient="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | sed 's/.* for //' )"
1219 [ -z "${recipient}" ] && recipient="${IRC_CMD_USER}"
1220 origext="$(grep -E "^#${hashtag} " "${hashtagfile}" | sed 's/.*\.//')"
1221 {
1222 filter="$(printf '%s\n' "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -d' ' -f3)"
1223 if [ "${filter}" = "random" ];
1224 then
1225 filters=("antidepressant" "amplify" "amsterdamify"
1226 "banjo" "bounce" "breakingnews"
1227 "celtify" "concatenate" "crimetv"
1228 "curb" "daybowbow" "deathmetal"
1229 "developers" "dontdoit" "dontsaytoyourmother"
1230 "doomify" "dutchapprove" "french"
1231 "FRENCH" "imam" "lop" "loop" "looop" "loooop"
1232 "mow" "namflashback" "news"
1233 "pullmyfinger" "putin" "reverse"
1234 "richardstrauss" "ritual" "sadviolin"
1235 "science" "scrollify" "sendtohell"
1236 "sexify" "slavify" "slowdown"
1237 "smith" "speedup" "techno"
1238 "technodrugs" "thin" "torture"
1239 "tshirt" "trumpapprove" "USAUSA"
1240 "usa" "wat" "widen" "ww1"
1241 "yellow" "zucc")
1242 filter="${filters[ $RANDOM % ${#filters[@]} ]}"
1243 fi
1244 outfile="${filter}-${hashtag}.mkv"
1245 outpath="/br/gopher/memecache/filter/${outfile}"
1246 inpath="/br/gopher/memecache/${hashtag}.${origext}"
1247
1248 [ ! -f "${inpath}" ] && exit 0
1249
1250 # outfile and outpath filtering for the cache.
1251 case "${filter}" in
1252 antidepressant|ritual|putin|tshirt)
1253 outfile="${outfile%.*}.jpg"
1254 outpath="${outpath%.*}.jpg";;
1255 wat|smith|zucc)
1256 mimetype="$(file --mime-type "$inpath" | cut -d':' -f 2 | cut -c 2-)"
1257 # Only allow images to be free.
1258 case "$mimetype" in
1259 image/webp)
1260 # deface does not like webp. Make it png.
1261 newinpath="$(mktemp -u -p /tmp "${infile%.*}XXXXX.png")"
1262 magick "${inpath}" "${newinpath}" >/dev/null 2>&1
1263 inpath="${newinpath}"
1264
1265 outfile="${outfile%.*}.png"
1266 outpath="${outpath%.*}.png";;
1267 image/*)
1268 outfile="${outfile%.*}.${origext}"
1269 outpath="${outpath%.*}.${origext}";;
1270 esac
1271 esac
1272 # Cleanup if outpath file is empty.
1273 [ -f "${outpath}" ] && [ ! -s "${outpath}" ] && rm "${outpath}"
1274
1275 # determine gopher type for output file
1276 outmimetype="$(file -ib "${outpath}")"
1277 case "$outmimetype" in
1278 image/*) outtype="I";;
1279 *) outtype="9";;
1280 esac
1281
1282 if [ -s "${outpath}" ];
1283 then
1284 annna-say "${recipient}, gophers://bitreich.org/${outtype}/memecache/filter/${outfile}"
1285 exit 0
1286 fi
1287
1288 case "${filter}" in
1289 antidepressant) antidepressant "${inpath}" "${outpath}" >/dev/null 2>&1;;
1290 ritual) satanic-ritual "${inpath}" "${outpath}" >/dev/null 2>&1;;
1291 putin) putin-os "${inpath}" "${outpath}" >/dev/null 2>&1;;
1292 tshirt) tshirt-design "${inpath}" "${outpath}" >/dev/null 2>&1;;
1293 *) ffmpeg-effect "${filter}" "${inpath}" "${outpath}" >/dev/null 2>&1;;
1294 esac
1295
1296 # Remove temporary png for deface.
1297 case "${inpath}" in
1298 /tmp/*.png) [ -e "${inpath}" ] && rm "${inpath}";;
1299 esac
1300
1301 [ -s "${outpath}" ] && annna-say "${recipient}, gophers://bitreich.org/${outtype}/memecache/filter/${outfile}"
1302 } &
1303 exit 0;;
1304 esac
1305
1306 printf '%s' "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | awk -v taglimit="$printnhashtags" '
1307 $0 !~ /#nospoil/ {
1308 while (match($0, /[#*&]+[^# /"'\'',?!;$\001]+/)) {
1309 tag = substr($0, RSTART, RLENGTH)
1310 $0 = substr($0, RSTART + RLENGTH)
1311 sub(/[.]*$/, "", tag)
1312 if (!uniq[tag]++ && taglimit-- > 0)
1313 print tag
1314 }
1315 }' | head -n "$printnhashtags" | while read -r tag;
1316 do
1317 [ "${tag}" = "#expand" ] && continue
1318
1319 origtag="${tag}"
1320 pointer=0
1321 revpointer=0
1322 case "${tag}" in
1323 "*"*) tag="#$(printf "%s\n" "${tag}" | sed "s,^[\*]*,,")"
1324 pointer=1;;
1325 "&"*) tag="#$(printf "%s\n" "${tag}" | sed "s,^[\&]*,,")"
1326 revpointer=1;;
1327 esac
1328
1329 tagline="$(grep "${tag} " "${hashtagfile}" | shuf -n 1)";
1330 if [ -n "${tagline}" ];
1331 then
1332 if [ $nospoil -eq 0 ];
1333 then
1334 if [ $pointer -eq 1 ];
1335 then
1336 inpath="/br/gopher/memecache/${tagline##*/}"
1337 [ ! -f "${inpath}" ] && exit 0
1338
1339 outfile="${tag#\#}.jpg"
1340 # pointy pointers
1341 outpath="$(printf "%s\n" "${origtag}" \
1342 | sed 's,\*,&\n,g' \
1343 | grep "^*" \
1344 | while read -r asterisk;
1345 do
1346 outfile="*${outfile}"
1347 outpath="/br/gopher/memecache/filter/${outfile}"
1348 printf "%s\n" "${outpath}"
1349 if [ -e "${outpath}" ];
1350 then
1351 inpath="${outpath}";
1352 continue
1353 fi
1354 pointer "${inpath}" "${outpath}" >/dev/null 2>&1;
1355 inpath="${outpath}";
1356 done | tail -n 1)"
1357
1358 if [ -e "${outpath}" ];
1359 then
1360 outfile="$(basename "${outpath}")"
1361 annna-say "${origtag}: gophers://bitreich.org/9/memecache/filter/${outfile}"
1362 fi
1363 elif [ $revpointer -eq 1 ];
1364 then
1365 inpath="/br/gopher/memecache/${tagline##*/}"
1366 [ ! -f "${inpath}" ] && exit 0
1367
1368 outfile="${tag#\#}.jpg"
1369 # pointy pointers
1370 outpath="$(printf "%s\n" "${origtag}" \
1371 | sed 's,\&,&\n,g' \
1372 | grep "^&" \
1373 | while read -r asterisk;
1374 do
1375 outfile="&${outfile}"
1376 outpath="/br/gopher/memecache/filter/${outfile}"
1377 printf "%s\n" "${outpath}"
1378 if [ -e "${outpath}" ];
1379 then
1380 inpath="${outpath}";
1381 continue
1382 fi
1383 revpointer "${inpath}" "${outpath}" >/dev/null 2>&1;
1384 inpath="${outpath}";
1385 done | tail -n 1)"
1386
1387 if [ -e "${outpath}" ];
1388 then
1389 outfile="$(basename "${outpath}")"
1390 annna-say "${origtag}: gophers://bitreich.org/9/memecache/filter/${outfile}"
1391 fi
1392 else
1393 annna-say "${tagline% *}: ${tagline#* }"
1394 fi
1395 fi
1396 else
1397 if [ $doexpand -eq 1 ];
1398 then
1399 taglength=$(utf8expr length "${tag}")
1400 if [ $uriexpansion -eq 0 ] && [ $taglength -gt 3 ];
1401 then
1402 didyoumean="$(annna-meme-recommend "${tag}")"
1403 if [ -n "${didyoumean}" ];
1404 then
1405 annna-say "Did you mean: ${didyoumean}?"
1406 fi
1407 fi
1408 fi
1409 fi
1410 done
1411
1412 case "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT,,}" in
1413 *\#nospoil*);;
1414 *rfc[0-9]*)
1415 rfcname="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | sed 's,.*\(rfc[0-9]*\).*,\1,')"
1416 annna-say "${rfcname}: ftp://ftp.rfc-editor.org/in-notes/${rfcname}.txt";;
1417 esac
1418
1419 # Always keep the karma / shame last!
1420 case "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" in
1421 *"-shaming"*)
1422 shametext="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | sed 's,.* \(.*-shaming\).*,\1,')"
1423 shame "${shametext}" >/dev/null;;
1424 *"arma is a bitch"*) annna-say "${IRC_CMD_USER}, I object! Karma is a nice girl!";;
1425 # For referee scoring.
1426 "score "*);;
1427 *++|*--|*-=?|*+=?|*+=-?|*-=-?)
1428 karmatext="$(karma "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}")"
1429 [ -n "$karmatext" ] && annna-say "karma: ${karmatext}";;
1430 esac
1431
1432 # Membership Level.
1433 ismember=0
1434 for member in $brmembers;
1435 do
1436 [ "${IRC_CMD_USER}" = "${member}" ] && ismember=1
1437 done
1438 [ $ismember -lt 1 ] && exit
1439
1440 case "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" in
1441 "${IRC_USER}, please go to sleep.")
1442 annna-say "Going to sleep ... Zzzz ..."
1443 annna-sleep-well;;
1444 "${IRC_USER}, please wake up.")
1445 annna-wakeup
1446 annna-say "Good morning BITREICH!";;
1447 "${IRC_USER}, can you show me the uptime please?") annna-say "$(hostname) uptime: $(uptime)";;
1448 "${IRC_USER}, please show me the load.") annna-say "$(hostname) load: $(LANG=C uptime | sed 's,.*load average: \(.*\)$,\1,')";;
1449 "${IRC_USER}, please give me the count of online users.") annna-say "$(hostname): $(who -q | tail -n 1 | cut -d'=' -f 2)";;
1450 "${IRC_USER}, please update the phlog index.")
1451 phlog-index > /dev/null 2>&1
1452 annna-say "Thanks! Your request has been fulfilled with the quickness! :)";;
1453 esac
1454
1455 # Referee Level.
1456 isreferee=0
1457 for referee in $referees;
1458 do
1459 [ "$user" = "$referee" ] && isreferee=1
1460 done
1461 [ $isreferee -lt 1 ] && exit
1462
1463 case "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" in
1464 "score "*)
1465 text="$(printf "%s\n" "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" | cut -d' ' -f2-)"
1466 case "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}" in
1467 *++|*--|*-=?|*+=?|*+=-?|*-=-?|*-=??|*+=??|*-=-??|*-=65536*)
1468 scoretext="$(brcon-score "${IRC_PRIVMSG_TEXT}")"
1469 [ -n "$scoretext" ] && annna-say "brcon score: ${scoretext}";;
1470 esac;;
1471 esac
1472