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       #Post#: 80184--------------------------------------------------
       Asking the host to cook something an alternative way
       By: frog24 Date: October 5, 2023, 11:17 am
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       Hi everyone.
       As we're coming up to Thanksgiving here in Canada, I have a
       Thanksgiving question and need your advice. Every year, we're
       invited to my M-i-L's house for dinner. She makes a full spread
       and it's the same classic menu every year (thankfully she's left
       off the mashed turnip in recent years, but that's another
       story). I always offer to help, and am told that everything's
       under control. By the time we get to her house, the only things
       left cooking are the vegetables. The turkey, potatoes, stuffing,
       ham, and rolls are all done.
       So here's the thing. My family likes Brussels sprouts. We pan
       fry them (or air fry them) with a bit of salt and garlic, and
       they're amazing. My M-i-L steams them... until they're a soggy
       beige-grey. There are several times in the cooking process where
       she opens the lid, stabs them with a knife (which slides out
       cleanly), then puts the lid back on and says "they just need to
       cook a while longer". (She does this with broccoli, too.)
       Although she cooks a whole bag of them, she eats only one sprout
       with dinner. Every year I choke down one of those mushy, funky
       little brassicas to be polite. My husband and kids won't even
       touch them. Then she makes us take home all the left overs. I
       just feel so bad that she's spending all this time and money to
       cook an amazing meal, but the sprouts are just so bad. This last
       year she even got an air fryer, so we could cook them there. Is
       there any way I can politely ask to have the sprouts made
       differently?
       #Post#: 80188--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Asking the host to cook something an alternative way
       By: Hmmm Date: October 5, 2023, 3:34 pm
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       I'd just ask and bring up the idea of the air fryer.
       "Our family has found that we really love Brussel sprouts cooked
       in the air fryer. I'm going to go ahead and prep some before we
       arrive and then i can reheat them when we arrive in your air
       fryer." If she pushes back, then let it go and enjoy your
       sprouts at home and don't worry about choking one of hers down.
       #Post#: 80189--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Asking the host to cook something an alternative way
       By: mime Date: October 5, 2023, 3:36 pm
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       Maybe offer to bring them again, but don't ask what you can do
       to help, but rather "I'd love to bring our pan-fried Brussels
       sprouts! Would you mind?" So it sounds more like something you
       genuinely want to do, rather than something you're offering for
       her.
       In addition to that, always say "pan-fried Brussels sprouts."
       Not "Brussels sprouts," not "sprouts," or anything else. Always
       be sure to include the "pan-fried" part so you distinguish it
       from her cooking method.
       If that doesn't work, don't accept her leftover sprouts. Be
       clear that they would just go to waste at your house because
       nobody eats them.
       This reminds me of a vegetable casserole we have every year at
       Christmas. I was truly impressed at how the original recipe
       managed to make vegetables so UNhealthy. One year I planned to
       make a leaner version. My mom kept telling me that I really
       shouldn't skimp on the rich ingredients because that's what made
       it so good. So.... I made the original version for her, and a
       healthier version for me, with enough of each for everyone else
       to have a choice. Nobody ate the unhealthy one. Not even my mom!
       By the end of dinner, we were out of my version, and nobody
       wanted to take home any of the one I made for her. It eventually
       wound up in the garbage. During dinner she kept insisting that
       everyone else should be eating the original recipe, even though
       she wouldn't do it herself. I don't know if she was holding on
       to a tradition or if she really thought her version was better
       (and felt compelled to be "good" and eat my version). I don't
       get her sometimes!
       #Post#: 80190--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Asking the host to cook something an alternative way
       By: Rose Red Date: October 5, 2023, 4:30 pm
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       Offer, or even tell her, you'll be bringing brussel sprouts as
       your holiday contribution because you have a recipe that your
       family seems to enjoy and you'd love her opinion on it too. If
       she insist on turning you down, you don't have to eat her
       version or take them home to be polite (or take them and toss
       them). Seems like she doesn't like her own sprouts either. Just
       compliment her other dishes.
       On a personal note, I use to wonder why a lot of people don't
       like veggies. There's even jokes on sitcoms. Then I tasted bad
       cafeteria food where the veggies are steamed until all the good
       flavors are gone and texture turned mushy or rock hard.
       #Post#: 80324--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Asking the host to cook something an alternative way
       By: AnnNottingham Date: October 22, 2023, 10:55 pm
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       I think you've already got good advice; it's ironic that I'm
       probably the only one who loves steamed, flabby Brussels sprouts
       and don't like the pan fried variety!
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