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#Post#: 9686--------------------------------------------------
Oh Tumblr
By: Rita Arthurs Date: May 9, 2015, 8:38 pm
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Saw this post and thought: YES
How To Tell If You Are In A High Fantasy Novel
[via The Toast]
The Elders would like a word with you.
The Ritual is about to begin.
Something that has not happened in a thousand years is
happening.
You are going to the City. There is only one City. It is only
said with a capital C. No one needs to bother saying the name of
the City. It is the City.
Certain members of the Council are displeased with your family’s
recent actions.
A bard is providing occasional comic relief; no one hired or
invited him and his method of earning a living is unclear. (lol
we need this)
The High Priest is not to be trusted. (<--THIS)
Someone is eating an apple mockingly.
There is one body of water. It is called the Sea. The Great Sea,
if you are feeling fancy.
You live in a region with no major exports, no centralized
government, no banking system, a mysteriously maintained network
of roads, and little to no job training for anyone who is not a
farmer.
You have red hair. You wear it in a braid. Your father was a
simple man, and you don’t remember much about him – he died when
you were so young – but you remember his strong hands, as he
fished or carpentered or whatever it was that he used to do with
them.
You’re going to have to hurry, or you’re going to miss the Fair
– and you never miss the Fair.
There is trouble at the Citadel.
Your full name has at least one apostrophe in it.
It is the first page, and you are already late for something.
Your mother affectionately chides you as you gulp down a few
spoonfuls of porridge; she will be dead by page forty-two.
There are two religions in your entire universe. One is a thinly
veiled version of Islam. It is only practiced by villains. The
other is “being a Viking.” You are a Viking.
There are new ways in the land that threaten the Old Way. Your
grandmother secretly practices the Old Way, as do all of the
people of the hills.
The real trouble began the day you arrived at court. Every last
nobleman hides a viper in his smile. How you long for the purity
of life in your village, which is currently on fire or
something. (lol this is the sequel)
#Post#: 9694--------------------------------------------------
Re: Oh Tumblr
By: Kiera Pearson Date: May 11, 2015, 6:19 am
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the title "Oh tumblr" really doesn't describe this.
#Post#: 9699--------------------------------------------------
Re: Oh Tumblr
By: Rita Arthurs Date: May 11, 2015, 10:17 am
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It's the source
#Post#: 9702--------------------------------------------------
Re: Oh Tumblr
By: TLangston Date: May 12, 2015, 5:13 pm
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I am still debating whether I should get a tumblr account... I
am not sure my (relatively) innocent mind would survive there!
#Post#: 9705--------------------------------------------------
Re: Oh Tumblr
By: Rita Arthurs Date: May 12, 2015, 5:29 pm
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Depends who you follow
#Post#: 9710--------------------------------------------------
Re: Oh Tumblr
By: Kiera Pearson Date: May 14, 2015, 12:55 pm
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1) how ok are you with swearing?
2) how ok are you with sexual references?
3) how ok are you with people not being hetro-normative?
4) how ok are you with feminism?
#Post#: 9711--------------------------------------------------
Re: Oh Tumblr
By: TLangston Date: May 15, 2015, 2:43 am
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1) Yes
2) Slightly less yes
3) Much less yes
4) Yes
#Post#: 9718--------------------------------------------------
Re: Oh Tumblr
By: Rita Arthurs Date: May 15, 2015, 5:40 pm
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You'll survive
#Post#: 9719--------------------------------------------------
Re: Oh Tumblr
By: Kiera Pearson Date: May 15, 2015, 6:03 pm
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idk, not being hetro-normative is pretty big, plus it's
considered part of intersectional feminism. You just need to
realise that hetro-normativity hurts, really hurts those who
aren't hetrosexual or cis, because whatever you believe or know
to be true basically denies their existence and what they
believe and know to be true.
Basically, while you can be offended, it's their turf and you
are the invader
#Post#: 9726--------------------------------------------------
Re: Oh Tumblr
By: Rita Arthurs Date: May 16, 2015, 11:01 am
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...riiight
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