We Interrupt This Program

By Shauna Klein

Cover Art by Karsun Designs

“Momma, why can’t I stay up late and watch Dynasty like all my friends do?”

“Now you hush, Amy, and go get your brother up. There’s no reason for you to be watching that kind of TV just because your friends do. If they all jumped off a bridge would you?”

“No, momma. Can we watch some TV after breakfast?”

“We’ll see. Now go get your brother like I told you. I got some eggs and sausage for you and your favorite too. ”

“Buttermilk biscuits?”

“You guessed it. Now get Bobby and wash up. It looks like it might storm later on – it’s getting pretty dark outside. Might break some of this heat though so I don’t think I’ll complain. Nope, we’ll just thank the good Lord for sending us some relief. ”

“I like it when it storms, momma.”

“I know you do but you know that lightning scares your momma. It’s like God himself turned out the lights and sent his thunderous voice down at us. I hope it won’t be a bad one. Now you go, like I told you. I swear girl, I have to ask you to do everything three times. ”

“I’m sorry, momma.”

“Never you mind, just do as I ask. Lord knows I don’t have any help around here since your daddy left us. Nope, he just ran off and left your poor momma to take care of you two without even thinking about how I might do it. Ran off with some tramp he met over at that heathen bar downtown.”

“What’s a tramp, momma?”

“Never you mind but I bet that Dynasty show is full of them. Oh yes, I saw how they strut around with their painted up faces and tight clothes. Even them ads are shocking. I heard that they even showed two women fighting. Course, that was just gossip over at the laundry mat. It’s not like I have any interest in a show like that. Didn’t I tell you to go get Bobby up for breakfast? Your food will be ready and if you don’t hurry I’m gonna give your biscuits away.”

“Momma, who would you give them to?”

“Don’t you worry about that. I may just eat them all myself.”

“You can’t eat them all, momma. You’re being silly now.”

“Well, I’m glad to know I can still make you laugh. Now go.”

***

“Momma, Bobby is showing me his food in his mouth.”

“Boy, if you don’t put a stop to that right now I swear I’m gonna go get a switch out of the yard. Do you hear me? You act like a little baby instead of a big boy. You’re almost four now, stop acting like a baby.”

“Amy, pick up them plates if you’re done and go put them in the sink. I think it’s…….”

“Momma, what’s wrong?”

“Do you hear that?”

“What, momma?”

“The TV, turn it up.”

“It’s beeps, momma. I don’t like that noise.”

“Oh dear sweet Jesus. It’s a war, baby. A nuclear war like we saw in that movie last year, The Day After. Do you remember? Oh dear God, it’s happening.”

“Momma, I’m scared.”

“Me too, baby. I can’t think right now. Let me clear my head a minute.”

“Momma, why are you crying?”

“Just a minute, baby.”

“Momma, what are we going to do?”

“Go fill up the tub and call me when you’re done.”

“Momma, why are we filling up the tub?”

“Never you mind girl, just go do it.”

***

“Momma, you didn’t say if you wanted hot or cold water so I used hot. Is it for storing water in case we need it?”

“No, baby. You know, I once heard that drowning was the most wonderful way to die. They say once you give in to it that it’s so peaceful.”

“Momma, I don’t understand. Why are you talking about drowning? We’re not going swimming are we? Bobby can’t swim at all.”

“I know, baby.”

“Remember that movie we watched? You remember how those poor people would have been better off dead?”

“Momma, why would someone want to be dead?”

“I didn’t say they wanted to but remember how they couldn’t get food and people tried to steal what little they had? We live in the country and I don’t have much but them people would come out here and take it. They might hurt your momma. Do you want that?”

“No, momma but someone will help us.”

“Who? Did you see anyone help them in that movie? That movie was as real as it gets. Once them bombs hit us from them soviets it won’t matter. Even if we make it through the blast the bad people will come take what we have. They might even rape your poor momma. Do you want that?”

“I don’t know what that means, momma. You’re scaring me.”

“It’s okay, baby. You’re a good girl. Help me get your brother in the tub. No, don’t take his clothes off. Just help put him in there like a good girl.”

“Momma, he’s scared.”

“Just do it girl, we don’t have much time.”

“There, now help me hold him down.”

“Momma, what are you doing? Stop it, you’re hurting him.”

“No, baby, I’m making it easier on him. He just looks like it hurts but just you wait, he’ll be okay in a minute and head out to see his sweet Jesus and rest in his arms.”

“Momma, please stop. He can’t breathe.”

“Look baby, he stopped. It’s okay now. Help me get him out and lay him on the bed.”

“Oh momma, what’d you do to him? Please take it back. I won’t ever tell on him again or anything. He was really good momma. He was too little. I’m sorry I said anything about him showing me his food. Please momma, what’s wrong with him?”

“He’s okay, baby. Look how peaceful he looks. Thank you, Jesus. Thank you for taking my boy into your arms and saving him from this wicked world of sin.”

“Now baby, I’m gonna need you to get into the tub.”

“No momma, I’m scared. I don’t wanna drown and die.”

“Baby, please don’t make your momma have to chase you down. I have to get ready too before them bombs drop. We don’t have a lot of time.”

“Momma, please.”

“Girl, if you don’t get into that tub I’m going to have to make you. You’re not making it easier and Lord knows your daddy sure ain’t here to help me. Don’t you want to meet your baby brother in heaven and see Jesus? Stop that crying and come here.”

“Momma, you’re hurting me.”

“Get in the damn tub. Now look what you made me do. Lord forgive me. This girl has made me use dirty words. Baby, please. It’ll be over with in just a minute. NOW GET IN.”

***

“Don’t you two look precious together? Now, where’d I put that drain cleaner? Too bad I can’t have gone with you two at the same time but there was no time to head out to the river and do it like that. I’ll just have to go the hard way but Jesus I’m on my way to see you and my boy and girl. Please keep them safe until I get there, Lord. I’m ready to leave this wicked world before everything gets bad, just like you said in Revelations. A lake of fire – maybe you meant this one here after the bombs drop. I don’t know Jesus but I’m ready to see you and my babies.”

***             

"This is a test of the Emergency Broadcast System. The broadcasters of your area in voluntary cooperation with the Federal, State and local authorities have developed this system to keep you informed in the event of an emergency. If this had been an actual emergency, the Attention Signal you just heard would have been followed by official information, news or instructions. This concludes this test of the Emergency Broadcast System."

I hope you enjoyed this short story. The idea came to me as we had some ice cream at a park near the bay. The people over from us had their radio playing and the Emergency Broadcast Announcement came on. If you’re like me, you always stop to listen just in case. After I heard that it was a test I wondered what would happen if it were a real emergency. Would the people come running over to share the news? Would we have rushed home to become glued to the television set? In any case, I thought about a woman who hears the message but doesn’t wait to find out what to do next.

You can find my other stories on Amazon at http://amazon.com/author/shaunaklein