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                                  MAIL FRAUD

                                by  L.E. Pirate

                      >>> A CULT Publication......1987 <<<
                        -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc-
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     Mail Fraud.  The best thing since sugar free Jello (right Psyche?).
   It is probably the most illegal thing you can get involved in, even worse
   than (gulp) credit card scams.  If you watch the news much, they nab alot
   of mafia dudes and drug guys for mail fraud, so I really do not recomend
   this as something you should do; I don't do it, so you know how much 
   trouble you can get in.

     In order to do this, you have to card an advertisement in a magazine for
   a cruise, like a 6-10 day cruise in the Bahamas and 2 days in DisneyWorld.
   Make the ad colorful, something that would "jump out" at the person.  I
   suggest you advertise in National Inquirer, Weekly World News, or something
   like that (the bullshit papers, "I had a UFO Monkey for a baby, etc.") Those
   kinds of papers will carry any ads.  Either get a voice mail system, or a
   voice line (which is so stupid since the feds will catch you faster than 
   you can say "jail sentence").  Make the voice mail system message say 
   something like this.

   (PLAY SOME MUSIC, NOT ROCK OR ANYTHING, LIKE MUZAK SHIT)
   "Hello there, you have reached Star*Dust International Cruise Line
    Reservations.  At the moment, no one is currently available in the
    office.  Please leave your name, and voice number where you can be reached,
    daytime or home numbers are accepted.  Please leave it at the sound of the
    tone.  Thank you, and have a nice day!" BEEP.

       Next.  Call them and say, "Star*Dust International calling" or whatever.
    Ask them if they would like a FREE cruise line listing.  Write down their
    address.  Before anything, you should call a real place and ask for some
    cruise line booklets delivered to YOUR house (YOUR address).  Make an
    official looking cruise line sheet to go inside the booklet, rip the ones
    out that are in there.  Ask shit like drivers license number, 2 forms of
    identification, visa/mc/amex card (you know), references, etc.  Tell them
    to mail it to a P.O. box (get one registered under an alias, not your 
    handle, dipshit, but like, 'TOM DICKFACE' or something.  If they need I.D.
    read the file coming out soon, 'PAPER FRAUD' or 'CHANGING YOUR I.D.', it 
    will appear in the first issue of Beyond TAP Magazine in March, 1988).
    Then tell them their tickets will be mailed to them.  You might want to
    call a place and ACTUALLY get them the tickets, or just forget about it.
    If you send the tickets, they will totally forget about it.  If not, I'm
    sure a full investigation will kick in.  Best to do it.

        Please be careful...I would not actually try this.  I have not tried
    it, and I do not plan on trying it.  I take no responsibility for what
    you do (right there, I said it).  If you try anything in ANY of my files,
    you are totally 100 percent liable for everything you do.  I did not make
    you do anything, and I assume you are not a 'tard and can understand that
    mail fraud is one of the grandmaster biggies of all time.  So stay cool.

        I'd like to thank ME, Swamp Rat, The Blade, Professor Falken, Ice Pic,
    Brain Tumor, The Traxster, Dr. Rom, Grass Lunatic, Bronze Rider, The Disk
    Jockey, The Perplexer, Dial Tone, Scourge, Fry Guy, The Snowman, and
    anyone that I forgot.  Big FUCK YOU's go out to Dead Lord who thinks Blade
    won't get his book sold.  Thanks again.

        Support these K00L Systems...

  Dragonfire Private.....Pr]OPEN SESAME Nu]DEAD..BBS for BTAP..609/424-2606
  Metal AE...............Pr]KILL...............................201/879-6668
  Demon Roach Underground Pr]xxxxxx     Nu]xxxx................806/794-4362
  Castle Catatonic.......Terminal]NEW   Nu]ROAMER..............806/794-1842
 
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 (c)1987  cDc communications  by L.E. Pirate                          0/0/87-44
 All Rights Worth Shit

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