Archive-name: Bestial/bearhunt.txt
Archive-author: 
Archive-title: Bear Hunting


	A friend of mine, named Bill, decided he wanted to go bear hunting.
A lot of stress at the office and such, so I told him I have a camp in the
Poconos, in Pennsylvania.  It's only a few hours outside New York and the bear
hunting is absolutely fantastic.
	The next weekend he called me up and asked if he could retire to my 
cabin for the weekend.  Naturally I ascented and I expected he would have a 
great time, little did I know just how good a time he would have.
	
	He didn`t need any hunting equipment because I kept a 12 gauge, and
pleanty of gear in the cabin.  He pulled in around 10 o`clock that night and
from such a long day pretty near passed out on the cot layed beside the 
fire-place and woke up bright and early the next morning.
	Upon rising, he fixed himself a breakfast of cold oatmeal and sat out
on the porch to watch the sun rise.  After breakfast he set about getting 
ready for a good day of bear hunting.  The gun was easy enough to find lyin'
up across the mantle-piece and there was pleanty of ammo in a box set in the
floor.  So he loaded that gun up with 9 shells and put a handful of shells in
his pocket and headed out for a day in the woods(no different story) hunting
bear.
	He wasn't out for more than an hour and not even two miles into the 
hills near the cabin when what does he spot in the distance?, One primo bear
specimen and a male by the looks of him.  Without even given a thought to the
idear of killing such a fine animal he pulls the gun up to his shoulder and
pulls the trigger, letting go a whollip on that there bear.  The bear fell.
	Well, ol' Bill couldn't believe it was that easy.  He was quite a 
natural at this.  He had a spring in his step as he approached the spot where
he felled the beast.  When he got there he was quite surprised to find that
the bear was nowhere to be seen.  He looked and looked but no bear, no blood,
no nothing.  Bill at that point had given up and was heading home when all
of a sudden he got a tap on the shoulder.  Well he spun around and what to his
wondering eyes did appear but an 8 foot bear standing on his hind legs.  Bill
practically wet his pants.
	"You know I could kill you right know you stupid son-of-a-bitch", the
bear said.  Bill did wet his pants.
	"I got a soft side in me though and I'll make you a deal...", bill
pondered this for a moment,"You've got to suck my dick if you want to get out
of here alive and then I never want to see you in this part of the forest again
.."
	What was Bill to do?  So he consented.  He got down by the towering 
beast's hairy prick, which was already erect and out of its sheath.  He had 
never given anyone a blow-job before but having had it done on him a number of
times he got the hang of it.  When the bear blew his load Bill was so disgusted
, he nearly hurled, and let the ghizm run down his face as he jerked the bear
the rest of the way off.  Bill headed home in disgust.  That fucking bear made
the biggest fool of him.  If it was the last thing he did he was going to kill
that bear.
	That afternoon, he headed back out into the woods in full camoflauge
determined to bag that bear.  He was almost to the same place he was before
when all of a sudden there he was in nearly the exact same location he was not
a few hours ago.  There he was, yep, same damn bear!  He follwed him for a 
while along the length of the gun barrel before he leveled him.  Pow!, down
he went with a thump.  This time he even heard the thump.  He was very careful 
as he approached holding the gun out in front of him prepared to finish him
off if he dared to still be breathing.
	When he reached the clearing he was nowhere to be found.  Bill started
cursing.  Then all of a sudden he received a gentle tap on the shoulder.
	"Still didn't learn did you?"
	"Well you know I could kill you but I'm a lonely bear"
	He just whipped out his salami and waited for Bill to do his business.
This time however, the bear made him swallow.
	On the way home Bill dreamed of how he would mount that bear's head 
on his wall at home.  He didn't even wait to get home before he headed back
to get even with that bastard.  He went back to the same site, expecting the
stupid bear to be in the same place.  Sure enough, there he was, just waiting
to have his brain's blown out.  Like clockworks, the gunfire ricochets off
the forest and the bear falls.  Bill reaches the place and,....tap,tap.
	"Tell me the truth, you didn't come out here to hunt bear did you?"

	
	Since then Bill's been up there every weekend.  Hasn't shot anything,
but he claims to be haven a mighty good time.

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