Strange dreams about organizing a
show. Michael Jackson was to play
alongside Jimi Hendrix. I don't
think these two ever played in
the same show, I told myself. The
show was a mess although it was
well attended. There was some
frustration in the public about
scheduling and who plays when. 

It's nice to dream again. My
energy levels are coming up.
Thinking about Molly make
me want to cultivate my energy.
Even if I might never see
her again, she lives on the
island, I want to better myself
for her. It's silly, but having
any sort of external motivation
really helps. I want to save my
sexual energy for her. I want to
circulate and gather more chi, I
want to train more, I want to
become better at what I do.
I want to make music that she
would dance to.

I'm so simple and silly.
Just one kiss and I'm dreaming.
Like the sleeping beauty, my
world opens up. If I'd knew
that's all I needed, just a kiss,
I would have done that a long
time ago. I am not sure how long
this will last. This dance,
between the masculine and the
feminine, the dancer and the
musician, the seed and the womb,
the giving and the receiving, the
sun and the plants growing toward
it. This play of attraction,
energy and creativity.

I remember when Molly was
massaging my head. We talked
about tantra, we talked about
soul attraction. How she met me,
and why now we were talking about
evolution while my head was on
her lap. The many level of how
people are attracted to each
other, and how past life might
sometime comes in play. That what
was going on at that moment was
also a teaching, if we'd knew how
to listen to life itself.

When I think about it, I went
deep in all the discussion I had.

From mental illnesses, to finding
one's own voice and community, to
enlightenment. It was all
welcomed, I was surrounded by a
bunch of freaks. Talking to May,
a beautiful women who looked like
she had some mental fragility, I
shared with her how I sensed that
from her, and that I like that in
people. She shared she had some
bi-polar disorder, and that she
somewhat liked that. She felt she
was more human because of it.

Talking to an ex-drug addict,
tattooed all over her body,
including on top of her head, I
shared that I'm a freak inside,
but it doesn't show in the
outside. May was close by, and
said:

"Yeah you're definitely a freak,
took me a few minutes to realized
that when you talked to me"

It made me happy. I liked our
exchange. May live in Thailand
and has started a training in
circus and more specifically in
clowning in the town of Po. For
her to call me a freak, I can
take that at face value.