then there's the doctors office in Modesto, California where
   they believe in raising people's self-esteem. The doctor checks
   you out, top to bottom, through and through and in the end says,
   "Everything's great! You're just the perfect weight. There is
   nothing wrong with you. Your diet is ideal and all of your
   personal habits contribute to your overall health. Internally,
   you are years younger than other people your age and you can
   expect a long life. Don't change a thing. Keep up the great
   work!" Coincedentally, they have the highest mortality rate of
   any doctor's office outside of Alberta, Canada. "