April ----- It's April already. I'm still here, but distracted. I want to talk a bit about solo RPGs. At some point I want to write a longer post on this topic. This could be it, but I'm not sure I have the energy today and I'm tired of not posting anything for months on end. So we'll see. RPGs (the tabletop variety) are a weird thing. They're also the most natural thing. I see my young daughters roleplay constantly. Sure they don't use polyhedral dice, but yesterday I watched them spend a whole hour sitting in a tree, talking out scenarios and building a world. So maybe they're only weird for adults who've forgotten how fun this used to be. There's definitely an awkwardness hump to get over with RPGs. You need several people to agree to take made-up stories seriously for a few hours. To agree that if the GM declares that something happened, that it has happened. The magic of it is that if you have several other people accepting this, it's easier for you to accept this also. Solo RPGs are even weirder. And the awkwardness hump is higher. You have to accept that if your subconscious thought of something and it is consistent with your make-believe world, then it has happened. This is harder to describe and harder to pull off. But it's no less engaging if you manage to do so. It also takes practice. My first attempts at solo play were several years ago now, and were a significant struggle. There was also a definite progression which went something like this: - First learning that people claimed to be able to play RPGs solo. Not understanding how it could work, but being intrigued. Hearing about things like Mythic GME. - Putting the concept aside in favour of regular RPGs, not really believing that solo play could actually be fun. How could "oracles" really replace an actual human GM? - Learning about Ironsworn, a self-contained solo/GM-less game whose rulebook is just brimming with encouragement and enthusiastic claims that one really can play an exciting and fulfilling RPG on your own. Reading and dreaming. - First actual attempt at play. Ironsworn has a combined world building and character creation step which is both hugely fun and composed of prescribed easy to follow steps. It's not RPing at that stage, but I was having fun. BUT the attempt failed because I don't live alone and at some point I got embarrassed about being an adult doing something weird and threw it all in the bin. - Second attempt, several months later, and I was actually able to proceed to playing. In the intervening time I'd become comfortable enough with the idea of playing games like this that I didn't feel so self-conscious. I'd also purchased IS Delve, which added some flavor. That first campaign proceeded haltingly for a few months, and taught me a lot about how to structure solo play. But it did feel like work. My sessions were always quite short, and I always felt exhausted by the end of them. My journal entries were very detailed and contained all sorts of terrible descriptive prose. I was always keen to get to the next "move" so that I could do something besides write. Eventually my campaign petered out and didn't really go anywhere for several months. At some point though, IS Starforged went on sale on drivethru and I impulse-bought it. I'd heard that the mechanics differed in several ways from the original Ironsworn (IS) and I was also keen to switch context to a space exploration setting. I started to play it pretty soon after buying it and again hugely enjoyed the world building and initial few sessions of my campaign. I had a bit more in the way of "endurance" by this stage, with sessions lasting longer. I still found writing to be a chore though, and writers cramp was a constant unwelcome companion. At this point I should say that all of my solo (and non-solo) RPing is entirely offline and analogue. I have no interest in using computers in my games in any capacity. I'm not sure why, but it's somehow part of the draw for me: I find the prospect of deep, imaginative games one can play using pencil and paper hugely enticing. On the flip side, this does mean that writer's cramp is part of the experience. Despite having a lot of fun playing and actually getting fairly immersed in the stories, there was still something missing: crunch. Games like IS are particularly focused on the "narrative". While they do have "mechanics", these are always subservient to the "narrative". Furthermore, the mechanics work on a very high level. The "moves" in IS are very general purpose and lacking in specifics. The game doesn't even track inventory. If, say, you find yourself needing a rope, you're encouraged to make a "check supply" move. Success means you have the rope, failure means you don't. I'm simplifying, but that's the gist. While these mechanics are beautifully designed to produce amazing stories, this somehow isn't completely satisfying for me. I don't really want to feel like I'm writing a story with dice, I want to feel like I'm actually exploring a cave/dungeon/spacecraft with real constraints. I want more game in my game. Enter Dragonbane, the recent reboot of the original early 80s Swedish RPG. I was lucky enough (although I dropped some pretty solid hints!) to be given a copy of the box set last Christmas. I've run games for my family, and the set includes a solo campaign by IS author Shawn Tomkin. It has a character sheet with health points and actual inventory slots. It has specific rules for camping. It comes with cardboard minis to move around on battle mats. It has a comprehensive set of skills to get better in which directly impact actions. It has its own lore including already fleshed out locations and characters. And the solo campaign fits perfectly within this already-vibrant world. It's been a revelation and I've been playing it more or less constantly for the last few months. BUT. I wouldn't have been able to enjoy this properly without having spent a year or two learning and playing IS. IS forced me to develop the habit of always having one or more active character drives ("iron vows" in the IS terminology). Playing it encouraged me to become proficient in interpreting oracle rolls. These abilities are very much muscles which need to be exercised, and using them becomes easier as they get stronger. So, that's my solo RPG journey until now. I'm not sure how it'll continue, but for now I'm having a lot of fun with a something that - unlike anything else I'd done in the last few decades - has little to do with computers or electronics. Not that there was anything wrong with that, but doing something else feels... healthy. .