From: rikamarie1@aol.com (RikaMarie1)
Newsgroups: alt.sex.stories.tg
Subject: My Story - Becoming a Secretary
Date: 19 May 1996 18:17:57 -0400

I have written this to save time and to answer many of the obvious
questions about my situation.  For those of you who see my room title on
AOL and are interested as to what happened to me, here is my story.  For
those not on AOL, the chat room that I usually open is "My Ex-Fiancee
Turned Me Into a Woman."  This is my story.

My story starts about a year ago.  I was working for a department store
chain as a merchandise manager with buying responsibilities. 
Unfortunately there has been a great deal of consolidation in the
industry, as in most of corporate America, and my job was eliminated.  I
received a nice buyout but there were few opportunities that I could take
advantage of and soon found myself butting my head up against a wall.

Just before I was laid off, my girlfriend Kathy and I got engaged.  We had
a healthy relationship for more than three years and figured that this
would be a temporary setback.  She has several degrees in material science
and owns a plastics' research, development and manufacturing company. 
After being out of work for close to three months she asked me to work for
her.

At first there were no real problems.  I dressed androgynously, fairly
casual.  This did not sit well with the secretaries.  They complained
about the apparent double standard dress code, that I was allowed to wear
pants and they could not.  She agreed with them that it was not fair. 
When the other secretaries made a big deal that I was allowed to wear
pants, she felt she had to do something or all the secretaries would have
demanded same.  I remember the Friday afternoon staff meeting when she
asked them what should she do?  They told her either they should be
allowed to wear pants or I would have to wear a blouse, skirt and heels
like they did.  At first they were joking about it but she then said, lets
put it to a vote, should we retain the current staff dress code or
institute a new one?  The four of them all voted to retain the old dress
code.  They would rather see me humiliated rather than have the option to
wear pants and be more comfortable.  They were all quite happy about it
and said that they could not wait to see how I came in on Monday, or if I
would quit.

That weekend she told me that I would have to start dressing like the rest
of the secretaries and that from here on out she wanted me dressed as a
woman.
She knew that from a past Halloween, that I dressed in the past, and that
I enjoyed it.  Since I did not have a very complete wardrobe, that
weekend, she took me to the mall shopping for a new wardrobe.  She ad me
dress androgynously to maximize my humiliation and referred to me with
male pronouns with many of the clerks at the start of the day.  Many were
curious and asked questions and she explained it to them, I pretty much
kept quiet.  I had to buy skirts, blouses and dresses that would be
suitable for work.  Next it was to Nine West four three pairs of  3-inch
pumps (black, beige and white) to coordinate with my new outfits.  Finally
she took me to Victoria's Secret, where a friend that we both knew worked.
 That was the most humiliating.  I was taken into the back into one of the
fitting rooms where I was measured completely.  Tonya, the manager,
suggested several styles that would suit me in the Wonderbra line.  She
pushed and tugged me into position and gave me some push up pads as well. 
Standing in front of her in nothing but a bra and panties was terrible.  I
put my blouse and shorts and Reeboks back on and went back out in the
store to pick out other necessities.  Since I didn't have on any makeup
yet, and the outline of my bra was visible under my blouse, everyone took
notice.  

After we left, I asked Kathy if we could go home and could I put on some
makeup and do my hair if I was going to be out dressed like this.  She had
a better idea she said.  Next it was on to Dillards for a makeover and my
own collection of makeup.  The cosmetic's saleslady thought it was
wonderful what she was doing to me, that she wished she could do the same
to her boyfriend but he was much to macho.  She thought I was suitably
femme.   Finally she took me to the salon where had my hair cut and
permed, had me waxed and had each ear pierced twice.  

On the following Monday  I started work as Rika.  That morning I had to
get up almost an hour early to get everything done in time.  Kathy fussed
over me, saying that I needed to look perfect, that I would show up the
other secretaries.  I tried my best and thought I looked pretty good. 
Then it dawned on me, the salesmen, who only were in the office one day a
week, would be in on Monday and would see me.  It was one thing for the
other women in the office to see me, it was another matter for the guys,
who knew me, to see me in my cream colored blouse, dark brown skirt and
beige pumps.

When we got in, we arrived a few minutes late and all the other
secretaries were at their work stations.  I had to walk past each one of
them, my new heels clicking with every step.  It was totally humiliating.
They all told me to stop in front of them and looked me over.  It was
obvious that I was completely shaved, that my waist was nipped in by a
corselette and that I was wearing a very flattering bra.   All the other
secretaries laughed and made fun of me. One asked, "How does it feel to
have to dress the way we do?"  I told them that I was embarrassed, very
uncomfortable and self conscious but I would do my best to fit in with the
rest of them.  They told me that they had a bet amongst themselves that I
would quit rather than come to work this way but they were all glad that I
was finally put in my proper place.  It was just too bad that working for
Kathy, that I was like an executive secretary.  Now that I was just one of
the girls, rather than Kathy's boyfriend/fiancee, Barb, since she was
senior, should take my place.  Kathy smiled a bit when she heard that. 
They all told Kathy how pleased they were that no longer would any
exceptions be made for me. 

Previously I was not in the coffee rotation but from here on out, I was. 
They said that since I hadn't in the past, that today would be my turn. 
At 9:30 the six salesmen started to arrive for the 10 sales and marketing
meeting.  Needless to say I was the main topic of conversation for the
first 15 minutes or so.  In the past, I took the minutes as Kathy's
assistant but today I also had to serve Kathy, Robert, the marketing
director and all the salesmen their coffee.  It was obvious that in my
fairly short skirt, that all the men were checking me out.  Kathy
explained to all of them why I was dressed the way I was.  They all
started to chuckle and laugh; they all thought it was a great solution as
they would not want to see the other secretaries in pants either.

The meeting dragged on until lunch.  Subsequent to this, Kathy and I
usually went out together but she took me aside.  Starting today, since
that except for special occasions, she did not eat with the other
secretaries, she would no longer eat with me.  She told me that I would
take my lunch with the secretaries, and that I should eat in the 11:30 to
12:30 shift. The rest of the day dragged on and the teasing continued but
it had abated a bit.  I was never so glad that the day ended and  could go
home.

That night Kathy told me to get all my male clothes together.  It did not
take a genius to know what was next.  I boxed everything up and on Tuesday
morning, on the way to work, we dropped of ten boxes of clothes at Good
Will.  As we drove out of the parking lot, I knew that for the foreseeable
future, I would be living full time as Rika.

The second day was pretty much a repeat of the first except that the men
were not in the office.  Just before lunch, Kathy called me into her
office.  She told me that it would be a good idea to go down to DMV, tell
them I lost my driver's license and get a new one with my initials and a
new picture.  I said, "Did I have to?"  Yes, it would be more embarrassing
if I got pulled over with my old one.  I did as I was told and the woman
at the DMV said nothing, had me sign a change form and then had my photo
taken.

Things settled into a routine after that.  About two weeks later, after
the teasing died down and I became fully situated with my new position,
she brought me to her OB-GYN for a physical.  I knew what was next as she
prescribed a combination of female hormones and  started me on hormone
therapy.  About eight weeks later, at the first sign that the hormones
were starting to take effect, she told me that she no longer wanted to
sleep with me and sent me packing to the spare bed room.  A month after
that, she lost interest in my feminization and she broke off our
engagement.  Immediately I knew why, she was starting to date other men,
starting with Robert, the marketing director.  Although we lived under the
same roof, we were no longer intimate in any way.  She thought nothing of
inviting Robert over and she expected me to cook and serve them both. I
thought "How much worse could it get?"  It did not take long to find out.

By that time I was starting to develop breasts quite nicely and with no
clothes or job prospects, I was pretty much stuck where I was.  The next
step was to reassign me as Barb was given my post as Kathy's assistant
along with a formal title and raise.  Since I have a marketing degree, I
was reassigned as Robert's assistant.  Since I had a degree, the other
secretaries could not complain.  Robert was no fun to work for at all.  He
teased me the most when I started working as a female and I guess she
thought it to be punishment to be assigned to him, which it is.  I did not
last long, only about two weeks.  I asked to be reassigned again but there
were no openings so I was forced to quit..  Now I temp as a secretary for
four different agencies.  I work pretty much every day and when I am not,
I have freelance writing work, copywriting that I do.  Hopefully I can get
hired at one of the agencies on a full time basis. 

During the time between the end of our engagement and me quitting, I
sometimes dated male clients for her business functions.  Never sex, just
to escort them  when they visited her plant.  Currently I have no steady
boyfriend but would like to.  Someone who is understanding and can accept
me for what I am and what I will be.  I hope that once I get back on my
feet, I can save up for SRS.  For now I just need to survive.  It is just
a matter of time before I move out.  Kathy has been somewhat understanding
as I don't contribute anywhere near 1/2 the household expenses but in
reality the only space I take up is my room.  I still cook as a means of
equalizing things.

Many ask if I am happy and can I go back?  Hard to say with all certainty
on either question.  Since I always had transgender tendencies, this has
been an interesting experience to go through.  From the comments I get
on-line, it is every TV/TG/TS dream come true.  In reality it is a hard
struggle.  I have pretty much lost my identity and my job history is now
nil, except for the past year as a secretary.  As far as going back to
living as a male, the hormones have already started to have an effect.  If
I stop, most of the effects will go away but I do like some of the
changes, especially in my temperment.  I am a lot calmer now, far less
intense than I once was.  

I need a good sized break from someone who is not afraid to hire a skilled
marketing person who happens to be transgendered.  I pass no problem,
visually, but my voice is still suspect.  If you can help or would like to
make any comments, please E-mail me at rikamarie2@aol.com.  If you want to
see what I look like, if you are on AOL, you can type GALLERY as a keyword
to go to the on-line photo gallery.  Next click on the search icon.  When
the next screen comes up, click on all galleries then type in transsexual
as a keyword.  A number of listings will appear.  Any that say  Rikamarie1
or Erika Dale are my GIFs.  Follow the directions to download and you are
set.