I should be proud that I didn't smoke a cigarette for over 6 months and glad that I hardly feel the urge to even think positively of them. But instead I feel how ridiculously hard it is to loose weight. It's so inconceivable for me that I could stay at it for more than a few weeks that the thought of it sometimes resembles the fact of an impossibility. Being more and more disgusted by my body is my only driver. Not a motivating one or one that otherwise elicits good feelings or hope. Health points yesterday: ? Alcohol so far: none Nicotine: relatively heavy vaping, 0 - 0.15 mg/ml